Page 74 of Riot

He has become my guide, my protector, my lover, and my home.

I should care that he manipulated it this way, but I don’t because I’m beginning to understand he was right. I need him, and he needs me. We were meant to be. It doesn’t matter how it started.

“And?” he prompts, interrupting my thoughts.

“And?” I repeat, my brows drawing together in a frown, not understanding.

“Are you going to apologize to yourself?” he asks.

“Oh.” I blow out a breath, unsure what to say. I always feel raw and exposed with him. He has this ability to see too deeply and understand too much. It’s unnerving as well as endearing. Anyone else might just let it slide and tell me it’s okay.

Not Kage.

Taking my silence for denial, he takes matters into his own hands.

Turning me, he forces me to meet my gaze in the mirror in my dressing room, where I was when I took the call. My eyes meet his in the reflection before returning to my icy ones.

“Apologize, right now, to you—to the child, the teenager, and the woman. Apologize for not loving her enough. This body keeps you alive. It saved you. This mouth and throat sing songs that transport people. These eyes . . . they saved me. Apologize, Fallon.”

“I—” I swallow as I stare into my eyes. He waits, not letting me escape. “I’m sorry for not loving you enough. I’m sorry for believing everything they said. I’m sorry for hating the shape of you, the color of you, the size of you when you kept me alive and housed my heart and soul. I’m sorry for loving everyone else more than you when you are all I have.”

“Good girl.” His hand slides softly across my hair. “You did so well.” His mouth meets my ear. “Now show it how sorry you are. I’ll help.” He lowers to his knees behind me, and my eyes widen. He slides his hands up my skirt until my panties are exposed.

I gasp, trying to turn, but his hands keep me in place, my eyes on our reflection as his lips move across my ass, leaving soft, devastating kisses. “Look at how beautiful you are.”

I have no choice but to run my eyes over my body, trying to see what he sees. I’m beautiful, enough people have told me, but as his voice whispers against skin, I start to believe it. I start to understand that I can use it for my pleasure.

I can love it for me, not what it can bring me.

His hands glide up my inner thighs, parting them so his mouth can brush over my panty-clad pussy, making me whimper. “This world would fall if they heard you like that. You should be worshiped like a goddess. You are untouchable. You are beautiful. You are kind and soft, hard and crazy. You are talented and beautiful. You are everything. Don’t you see?”

“Kage,” I whisper as he tugs off my panties. I help him, lifting my sore leg, and he lays a kiss there as he exposes not just my body, but my soul. He looks at my fears, worries, and insecurities, and he kisses them, calling them beautiful even when I couldn’t.

“You are so worth loving. Don’t you see how you captivate this world and everyone in it? How you captivate me? One meeting and I knew you were someone important, someone I wanted to spend the rest of my life trying to live up to. Your soul might be filled with scars, but light gets in and melts the ice, and I will be your light. I will be your poet, your warrior, your king, and your clown. I will be whatever you need because I love you. I love you enough for both of us.”

All I can do is stare into his eyes, seeing what he sees. His voice drowns out the one inside me that constantly tells me I’m not enough and never will be because for the first time, I realize I am.

I deserve to be loved.

I deserve to be happy.

He smiles against my inner thigh and places a kiss there before turning his head and pressing one to my clit. His hands part my ass to give him more room as his tongue darts out to taste me.

It’s time to stop breaking my own heart, so instead, I hand it over to him, knowing he will keep it safe for me. He will meticulously seal those cracks left by others and my own hands. Kage will love me even when I can’t love myself.

“If you ever forget, just look into my eyes and see how much I love you . . . see you the way I do. I will love you when you forget to. I will remind you when you’re lost,” he promises, meeting my eyes. “I will be right here with you every time, until you love yourself the way I love you.”

He shows me without words. His tongue traces across my folds as I watch myself in the mirror. My cheeks heat with a blush that spreads down my chest, lighting up my skin like a ruby is trapped inside. I watch my ocean eyes darken and melt, and I watch the way my lips part. My skin heats under his touch as his tongue slips inside me and fucks me. I moan, rocking into his touch. My hands slide across my body, reclaiming it and memorizing the way my soft skin feels under my caress.

I enhance my own desire, using his mouth to get where I want. Right now, it’s not about him, but me. His tongue presses against my clit as pleasure washes through me. My eyes want to close, but I force them to stay open and watch the beauty of my desire.

When I reach the precipice, I allow myself to fall over the edge and into his waiting arms.

I come in his mouth as he hums, licking up my desire until I’m shaking and leaning heavily into his hold to stay upright. He places a soft kiss on my sensitive clit and moves back.

“Look at how much power you hold inside your body. Look at your magnificence.”

Panting, I look down as he moves to kneel at my side, gazing up at me.

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