Page 35 of Reclaim Me

HUNTER

Now

Right now.

Tomorrow.

Later this week.

Any of those would have been an acceptable answer to the question I posed to Rae on the night a slip of her tongue led to me finding out that her daughter is mine.

Mine.

Riley is mine.

She’s Rae’s, and she’s mine.

She’s ours.

I’d let go of the idea of sharing anything with Rae a long time ago, but now I’m consumed by it and thoughts of the little girl whose mother is still withholding her from me. She could have given me any answer. She could have said anything because anything would’ve been better than the silence I’ve sat in for the past forty-eight hours.

Silence I can’t touch or break because I don’t have any way of contacting Rae, and even if I did, I wouldn’t use it because I know this must be hard for her, too. For nearly a decade, she’s kept this secret, and it can’t be easy to come to terms with the fact that it’s all out in the open. My knowing, but most importantly my desire to be involved, has changed everything for her, and it will do the same thing for Riley. I keep reminding myself of that, hoping it will help me to be patient while Rae makes her decision, but patience is a hard thing to exercise when I’ve already missed so much of my daughter’s life.

“What happens if she doesn’t come around?” Nate asks, sitting cross-legged on the couch across from my desk while I pace in front of it. “What if she decides your past makes you unfit to be a father and says you can never be a part of Riley’s life?”

I shake my head, unable to even consider that outcome. “Rae wouldn’t do that.”

“Rae is a mother with a little girl she has to think about, that she has to protect. She’ll do anything to eliminate a threat, and that could easily include doing what’s necessary to keep you away from her kid.”

“Our kid,” I correct him, stripping the agitation from my tone because I know he’s just trying to push me to consider all possibilities, especially the most likely one. “She’s our kid, Nate. She’s my kid, and I—” I rub at the back of my neck “—I can’t miss anything else.”

“I hear you, Hunter, and I hope you don’t have to, but I want you to consider what might happen if things don’t go as smoothly as you want them to.”

Tired of pacing, I lean against my desk and blow out a breath. “I’m going to be honest, Nate, I can’t picture any scenario that doesn’t end with me being a part of my daughter’s life. It has to work out. It has to.”

Nate nods. “Then, for your sake, I hope it does.”

“Thanks.”

“Don’t thank me. I haven’t done anything but cave into your delusion, which isn’t at all my job as your sponsor.” He stands and stretches, wincing in pain. “You need a new couch, that shit is uncomfortable.”

I can’t help but laugh. “Taurin said the same thing.”

At the mention of my new live-in sponsee, Nate smiles. “How’s the kid doing anyway?”

“He’s alright, besides the whole mad at the world thing.”

Taurin’s only been staying with me for a few days, but I’ve already attuned myself to his anger. After the initial shock of having a roof over his head wore off, it set in. When he’s not in school, he’s pouting around the house. I got so tired of looking at him mope around and listening to him talk about how fucked up it all was, I made him come to work with me today just so he could be productive and pouty.

So far, it’s been working well. He’s committed himself to wiping off mats and other equipment as well as making sure the water bottles and other sports drinks stay stocked in the fridge. I told him if he keeps this up, he’ll have a permanent place at the gym. He smiled and said he actually wouldn’t mind that. It was the first real smile I’d seen from him since we’veknown each other.

As if we’ve spoken him up, Taurin comes striding through the door with a bottle of cleaning solution and a towel in his hand. Although he’s already crossed the threshold, he taps his knuckles on the door.

“What’s up, T?”

“Someone’s here to see you.”

“Well, I guess that’s my cue,” Nate says, waving to me on his way out the door. “Keep me updated, Hunter. Later, kid.”

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