Page 104 of Reclaim Me

I know that’s not true. I got a text from Riley this morning, and I FaceTimed her as Taurin packed so he could show her the new plushies he bought her for her growing collection. Before we hung up, she reminded me of our plans to have s’mores when she comes over next weekend.

So I have her.

I have my daughter, and that’s the most important thing in the world to me, but it doesn’t take away the sting of losing everything else.

“Why not?” Nate asks.

I grimace, recalling the phone call from Aaron, of all fucking people, who asked me to allow her to stay home this weekend so they could celebrate Rae’s birthday as a family. He was cordial, friendly even, but there was smugness hiding underneath his tone, a gentle undercurrent that stomped all over my last nerve and made it necessary for me to voice my agreement through clenched teeth.

Of course, I was never planning to let Rae spend her birthday without Riley. That would have been cruel of me, and even though she broke my heart, I have no interest in doing anything to hurt her.

“It’s Rae’s birthday.”

“Oh, they didn’t want to include you in the festivities?”

“Nope.” I grind my teeth, and the muscle in my jaw pulses. “Aaron wanted it to just be family, and apparently, I don’t qualify.”

“Sounds like you have feelings about being left out.”

“I do.” I push to my feet, moving over to the punching bag hanging up in the corner. Nate follows, positioning himself on the other side of the bag to hold it steady. When he’s got a good grip on it, he nods. A silent green light for me to keep talking while I drive all of my anger and pain into the bag with my fists.

“He’s not her family,” I growl, throwing the first punch. It has so much force behind it that Nate has to let the bag go to keep it from colliding with his body. When it swings back to me, I spin into a kick that makes the chain securing the bag to the ceiling rattle. Nate steps out of the way, and I continue.

“He’s not her family,” I repeat, emphasizing each word with a blow to the bag. “Riley and me, we’re her family. We’ll always be bound together by blood and history, but she doesn’t have any of that with Aaron.” I’m panting now, wearing myself down with every punch and kick while Nate watches on. “They’re not even married, Nate. All this fucking time, and he hasn’t given her a ring. I mean, what the fuck is up with that?”

40

RAE

Now

Most people love their birthdays, but I’ve always kind of hated mine.

Not because I’m one of those women who’s afraid of aging—I’ve always been a firm believer that I’m like a good bottle of wine, only getting better with time—but because it’s hard to be excited about the day you were born when everyone who was there when you first entered the world is gone.

It’s been over a decade since I’ve woken up to phone calls from anyone who can tell me what the weather was like on the day of my birth, how long Mommy was in labor, or what the nurse I was named after looked like. I mean, I know the stories because I haven’t always been alone on this day, but I don’t get to hear them anymore, and it sucks.

Since becoming a mom, most of my birthdays have been low-key, consisting of spending time with Riley or just lounging around with no bra on. That was my original plan for this year, too, but Aaron talked me into doing things differently. I still got to spend some time with Riley and relax at home, just not for long. We spent an hour this morning watching cartoons while munching on the breakfast Aaron and Marcy prepared for me, but after that, I had to get up and out the door to go to a spa day Aaron booked for me, Dee, and Jayla at the Cerros Hotel downtown.

We spent the entire afternoon being pampered and treated like queens, and now that we’re dressed, relaxed, and all dolled up, we’re on our way up to the rooftop restaurant for dinner.

“This has been such a great day,” Jayla says, her ebony skin sparkling under the lights in the elevator. “I’ve always wanted to have dinner on the rooftop. People say it has the most amazing view of the city.”

Dee smiles and wraps an arm around me. “Only the best for our girl.”

“Not you acting like you planned the day,” Jayla scoffs while I laugh at my best friend’s silliness.

“You really think Aaron came up with all of this on his own? The whole spa day in the penthouse suite was my idea.”

“Yeah, probably because you’ve been wanting to do it and didn’t want to have to pay for it,” I quip, not mad at all because I don’t care how it’s all happened; I’m just glad that it did. Today has been nice.

“Damn right,” Dee returns, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Cost him a pretty penny too.”

She and Jayla high-five at that, and I just shake my head at the two of them. The elevator beeps, announcing our arrival at the rooftop, and the doors glide open, welcoming us to the outdoor dining experience.

“Hello, beautiful,” Aaron says, extending a hand to me.

I take it with a smile on my face because I am actually glad to see him. “Hi, I didn’t know you’d be here.”

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