Page 66 of Best Laid Plans

"Understandably," he cut in.

"And susceptible—"

"Are you saying if we spend the night together, I'll be taking advantage of you?" he asked, and I could see the hurt in his eyes in the warm glow of the solar lamps.

"Yes, that's what I'm sayin'."

It was true. I couldn't help how I felt. I wanted to jump into bed with him. I wanted to have sex with him, feel his hands on my body, and have an orgasm with a human (fine, with him) rather than a vibrator. I wanted it a lot. But tonight was an aberration—and cold reality would come with the sunrise, and it would be harder to get my armor back up to protect myself from Anson.

"I'd never do that, Nova. You know that about me."

I got out of bed. I couldn't stand this any longer. I couldn't understand what was going on. It was like the facts of my life had somehow become twisted, and Anson was being nice to me instead of calling me a deceitful bitch.

"I don't know you at all," I shot back, staring down at him from where I stood on the porch. "I never thought you'd believe me."

"Pete found the stolen—"

"In my apartment, yeah, yeah. Ever thought about how he probably planted it there to frame me?"

He looked taken aback. "He wouldn't do that."

"Seriously? You're still thinking that man has any integrity?"

He didn't reply, but it looked as if he was finally getting it. He nodded thoughtfully.

"Remember when we read Nietzsche?" I sat back down on the daybed, and didn't resist when he pulled me back to him.

"Yeah, Sugar, I do."

"Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed."

Chapter 25

Anson

Which illusion didn't I want destroyed? The one that told me Pete was a half-decent man or that Nova was everything I had thought she was.

The thing was that my broken heart had never healed after Nova. I didn't come back to Sentinel for years. I joined the military, watched friends die, and lost myself in more ways than one. But in the past four years, since I had taken over Larue Homes after my father's death, I'd found some measure of peace and stability. Trusting Nova and finding out that I made a mistake would wound me in ways I wouldn't be able to recover from.

But right now, I maintained an illusion that everything between us was as clear as the water flowing in the stream next to my cabin, so I dipped my head and kissed her, wanting something for myself, wanting to have something that was just mine. With Nova I was just Anson, a man with failings and insecurities, with faults and needs. To the world, I was Anson Larue, determined, strong, ruthless—always on my A game, always alert, always on.

I cradled her face and continued to kiss her, thrusting my tongue into her mouth, tasting her. Every cell in my body was alert to Nova. Just kissing her made me feel so fucking alive. When I didn't feel her resistance, I understood that she was also maintaining an illusion for this night to help bring some of the broken pieces together, even if for a short while. I deepened the kiss, stroking her tongue, and gently biting her pillow-soft lips.

Nova always tasted like a mint julep—fresh, sweet, and heady. I dropped my hand to her shoulder and let it wander over her body, feeling, touching, stroking, remembering. Her hands got busy and dove under my shirt to touch my skin. I groaned. Nothing felt this good in my life. No woman ever made me feel this good, this alive.

I cupped her breast, and she moaned. I licked the seam of her lips.

"You want this?" I asked because I couldn't bear it if she looked back at tonight and thought I took advantage of her. I wouldn't be able to stand that.

A low groan emanated from her. She shivered, not with fear, but with anticipation that I could feel, smell, and sense. I knew her. I knew my Nova. The only woman I ever loved, who I ever could, I realized with painful certainty. Hate her, distrust her—it didn't matter; I loved her still, always would.

She turned aggressive, our teeth clashed, and the kiss turned hard, brutal.

"Sugar, I need your words." I pulled back, panting.

She touched my cheek and smiled at me. "He who knows when he can fight and when he cannot, will be victorious."

I chuckled. "You're quoting Sun Tzu to me."

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