Page 61 of A Forever Love

“Then why didn’t you…come?”

“Uncle Connor asked me to give you time and space. What I hated the most was that I had no idea why you needed them—time and space. I was your fucking safe space at all times. At first, I was worried, then, I was upset. But when you didn’t come home for Christmas, I was furious—so angry.”

My chest tightens as I listen to his words.

“And when you didn’t reach out after Mom’s accident, I knew I’d lost you.”

Tears I’ve held back for so long stream down my cheeks, and this time, I act without overthinking. I throw my arms around him, hugging him the way I did when I was five years old. Guilt gnaws at me from within. My best friend was hurting, and I was busy safeguarding my own feelings. Despite what Carter believes, I’ve been selfish, especially when it comes to him.

“I’m really sorry,” I whisper when he finally wraps his arms around me. “I prayed for you every evening.

“I believe you, Mere,” he responds, kissing the top of my head like he used to when I was upset. “I just missed you so damn much.”

Hearing the quiver in his otherwise strong voice, my lungs burn with the heavy breath I release. “I’m here now. I promise.”

He holds my face gently between his hands. “Why did you leave? Just tell me, and I’ll burn whomever or whatever forced you away.”

The raw vulnerability in his tone instantly heightens my senses. I can never share the real reason with Carter. It would torment him endlessly, and he’d never forgive himself.

No, I can never do that.

“I can’t.” My voice is hoarse as I hide my face in his chest, and Carter lets out a defeated sigh.

After a few moments of silence, I ease back slightly and gaze up at him. “But I can tell you all about what I did during my time away.”

Indecision clouds his expression, and I muster a hopeful smile, attempting to steer the conversation in a different direction. I press my palms gently against his waist, my fingers brushing the soft fabric of his suit, hoping he’ll understand my silent plea, as he always has. Several heartbeats pass by as I hold my breath, until Carter’s lips slowly curve into a smile, and he cradles my head between his hands.

“If you leave out a single detail, you’ll be dead, mittens. I want to know everything.”

My chest swells with happiness as the familiar smile graces his face.

Carter begins chopping vegetables, and I hop up onto the counter next to him. Before I can even begin sharing anything, he nods toward my laptop. “What about your work?”

“I’m already eighty percent done. I’ll wrap it up tomorrow morning, don’t worry.” I give him a nonchalant shrug. “I’ll be ahead of Brandon in no time.”

Carter’s hand freezes at the mention of Brandon. “Yeah, beat that jerk mercilessly.” He waves the knife in the air with a determined look, but I can’t help my chuckle.

“We’re a team. Why do you dislike Brandon so much? He’s a nice guy.”

“I don’t dislike him. I hate him.” He gives me a pointed look. “Every time I see that asshole, he tries to rub in my face how close you two are.” Carter places the chopped peppers into a glass bowl and starts washing the mushrooms, his movements jerky all the while.

“That’s because he likes me.”

Carter retrieves the knife once more and holds it in front him. “Please tell me you don’t reciprocate his feelings.”

“Not in that way, silly. We bonded because he, too, didn’t have many friends when we were in school.” I shrug.

“Nothing you say will change my opinion of him.”

I can’t quite explain why I find a twisted amusement in his overprotectiveness and jealousy. “Alright then, you’ll be pleased to hear that Brandon is the worst hiking companion.” I show him a photo of Brandon sitting on a rock, out of breath, clutching a water bottle, while I stand next to him looking as fresh as a daisy.

“Do you really believe I feel better when I see him with you after you shut me and everyone else out of your life?”

“Oops.” I swiftly locate another photo. This is one of me with my girlfriends, all of us dressed up for a university event. “Would you believe I went to mixers and socials?”

Carter abandons his spot and fetches a paper towel. After wiping his hands, he moves closer and takes my phone, examining the photo intently.

“Who are you looking at?”

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