Page 104 of Promised Love

It really is work. He’ll be back. Hope rises in my chest, and I find my voice again. “For how long?”

“These cases take a long time. Sometimes even months.”

“Months?” I’m out of my chair. “I won’t see you for months? You’ll be gone just like that?” Treacherous tears run down my cheeks, my voice getting choked as I struggle to push words out.

Lukas is quiet, and if not for his labored breathing, I wouldn’t even know he was still on the line. “I’m always close, Autumn. Just an email or a letter away.”

E-mail? He’s going back to where it all started?

I thought I knew what heartache felt like, but I was so wrong. This feeling right now, as if Lukas has pushed his hand inside my chest and ripped my heart out…is more painful than any physical pain I’ve experienced.

“I thought we were closer than that.” My voice sounds so empty that it’ll haunt me for a long time.

I end the call and slide down to the floor. My back rests against the foot of the table. Sobs rack through my body as I hide my face in my arms, crossed over my knees.

How did this happen?

How did I not see this coming?

I thought we were on the same page, but how stupid was I? Lukas and I were not only on different pages, we were reading two entirely different stories.

While I thought we had finally found love in the promise that bound us, he was just giving me what I’d asked for—some fun before we could put an end to this stupidity my grandparents threw at us.

I should have known Lukas doesn’t take passed downs, and I’m exactly that.

What would he want to do with me anyway? Lukas is someone who risks his life for others, while my biggest battle is being able to stand up for myself.

Of course he thinks of me as some silly girl struggling to find her place not in the big world out there but in this small inn I’ve spent all my life in.

God, Autumn. Could you be any more pathetic?

When I look up, there’s paper sticking out from the edge of the table.

Just an email or a letter away.

That’s what he’d said.

I grab the paper and a pen and start writing.

I write until I can’t, until my eyes get heavy and sleep takes me away to a place where pain doesn’t rule my life.

* * *

“Yes, please come in. She should be here soon.” I hear Chiara’s voice, and the same instant, the door to my office flings open.

There’s loud screaming. One of the voices is mine and I think the other one is Chiara as she spots me sprawled out on the cold floor. “Autumn!”

I groan and try to pull my stiff body up. Wiggling my toes, I realize I’m still wearing the ankle boots from yesterday.

“What are you doing here?” Chiara walks to me and gives me a hand.

“I…” I look around the office in confusion, until my gaze catches the pages littered on the floor with my handwriting spread all across them. I bend down with a loud groan and pick them up before shoving them inside the spiral binder on the table.

Chiara raises an eyebrow before tilting her head toward the door. I follow her movement to spot Vienna standing patiently with a bag in her hand.

Crap.

“I’m…so sorry, Vi.” I try to fix my hair, having no idea how bad I even look. “I was… I…”

---