Page 23 of Hart Breaker

She laughs the way Mom always laughs. “I’m not even gonna pretend that’s not true. I will tell you something just so you can hold me accountable. I plan to pack that shit away before I have grandkids.”

Looking at myself in the mirror, I turn sideways and ask, “Is it weird that it feels selfish of me to want as many kids as I do?”

“No, not selfish. The world changed, and that is how most people feel. Back in my day, you always heard people saying they wanted as many kids as they could afford. And when your kids are your age, it’ll be something different. But the fact is, it doesn’t matter how many you have. You could have one, or you could have ten. I know my grandchildren will be loved by you, protected by you, taught by you, and they won’t be unhappy.”

“Yeah, they will until about ninth grade when they run full speed into puberty’s brick wall and turn into little assholes for”—I pause for dramatic effect—“how long was it that I treated the most important woman in my life like absolute?—”

“You didn’t treat me any differently than any other girl who runs face-first into the puberty brick wall,” she jokes.

“I love you, Mom.”

“I never doubted it.” She laughs. “But I do doubt the ability for you to keep that unstained if you don’t take it off, hang it back up, zip it in that bag, and put it in your closet.”

“Oh, you’re good.”

We both laugh, and then she helps me out of my dress, hangs it on the hanger, and places it in my closet.

Brett and I made up after a twelve-hour texting argument. He promised me that he’d try not to be jealous if I would try not to act like he was an idiot for seeing the way men look at me here at the brewery.

That was it. All good. Two thumbs up. Moving on…

Brooks Barn and Brewery is open four days a week, every week, with the exception of one week a year and that is next week. So, for the past four days, the entire Brooks family has been preparing for the occasion so that we can enjoy ourselves with all the familiar faces that come in from out of town to hunt and the fresh faces that will no doubt be joining them.

Unlike Brett and I, Lauren and I seem to be in a slump, which means she’s not talking much. I suspect she’s upset with me for not booting Brett to the curb. What she will someday understand is that compromise is a big part of a relationship, and communication, no matter how loud, is also something needed to maintain it.

I choose Brett the same way she chooses to wear her Blue Valley field hockey sweatshirt damn near every day.

Brett will be a good dad. He will teach his kids how to throw a ball and how to play golf, which is a good thing because I will not be teaching them how to play because golf is fucking boring. Which is another reason I love Brett—he knows this about me, he knows I am never going to be his partner on the greens, and he still wants to marry me. There are other benefits, like he’s not interested in the brewery, and he’s agreed to put in writing that what’s mine is mine, what’s his is his, and what will one day be ours together will be ours. And although it is not expressed, because nobody would understand why it’s important to me, is that Brett is never leaving here. His life is here just like mine is, be it together or separately. So if things took a turn, I would never have to worry that my kids would be moving across the country when they inevitably chose their dad over me.

GAME DAY

Hudson

“Hart, you gots to get up,” Lily’s sweet little voice sounds off before she pounces on my bed.

Her mother ended up extending her spa time, or whatever she was doing, which allowed Lily to stay with her daddy. This means she’s going to be at the game, and she’s super excited. Like super.

“Almost time,”—I smile—“but not quite.” As I open my eyes, I grab her and tickle her little belly. “Time doesn’t start until the alarm goes off, Lily. Girl bosses know this, and you will, too, one day.”

“Imma be a girl bossesess. My new friend, Sydney, my new friend, Riley, gonna be there. They telled me that.”

“Hey, don’t forget your old friends,” comes from the doorway.

I glance up to see my sister, Jillian, standing next to Boone, fake pouting with her arms crossed.

“I not. You and Mama Hart flower’s first friend.” Lily wiggles out of my clutches and legit does a super fly off the bed, damn near giving me a heart attack.

“All right, little flower.” Boone laughs, catching her easily. “Let’s give Hudson some time to wake up; his game day rituals are a little more complex than mine.”

Jillian chuckles. “He’s such a diva.”

“I diva, too?” Lily asks as they walk out of my room.

“You absolutely are.” Boone chuckles as they walk down the hall.

“I be a girl bosseses and diva, Daddy?”

“Darn right, you can,” Jillian answers for him. “Now, how about you and I go pick out our outfits for today and let Daddy focus on his game-day rituals?”

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