Page 162 of Seduction Under the Southern Stars

“Looks like it!”

“Have you decided where you’re going to live?”

I pick up the dish that contained the sausages and start scrubbing at the bits stuck to the side. “Not yet.”

“He wants you to go to the UK?”

“He said he’ll leave it to me, and that he’ll move to New Zealand if I really don’t want to go to England. I think he means it. He wants to see more of us and his new family. But of course his life is in the UK. He’s suggested that we go there for a couple of years, and then make up our minds. He says he’d like to show me around all the museums and sites, and that we could go on some digs together.”

He puts down the tea towel and leans on the counter. “That sounds like a great opportunity.”

I lean on the sink. My heart rate has picked up, and I have to concentrate for a moment to force the panic away. “I don’t know if I’m ready.”

He looks at me then, and his lips curve up. “Of course you’re ready.”

“I don’t know, Joel… Linc said that courage isn’t not being scared, it’s doing something in spite of being scared, and that the courage comes afterward. But I’m not so sure.”

“Yeah, I heard that you did a bungee jump.” His eyes are full of admiration. “I never thought you’d do something like that.”

“Me neither.”

“But you did. Because he supported you and encouraged you. And I bet you felt good afterward.”

“I did,” I admit.

“Honey, you’ve come so far. I totally understand if you don’t want to go—you have your career to think of, after all. But the museum will still be here if and when you come back. You could either put your MA on hold or take the opportunity to visit those museums and add another element to it—there are lots of birds that went extinct in the UK. I looked them up. The Dalmatian Pelican, the Great Auk…” He screws up his nose. “Can’t remember the others. But maybe you could do a comparison to the Moa or something.”

I scrub at a mark on the sink with a fingernail. “I could, that’s true. If it was just traveling there, I’d probably pluck up the courage and do it. But to move there? I’d miss you all so much.”

He pushes up and bumps my shoulder with his. “You’ll be having far too much sex to miss all of us.”

“Joel!”

He laughs. “It’s up to you, sis. But for what it’s worth, I think you should go. Come on, none of us is short of money—you can fly back regularly for a visit. And think of all the exciting things you could do while you’re there. You can go and see the Mary Rose and the HMS Victory, for Christ’s sake. I’d kill to see those.”

I turn to him and, even though my hands are all soapy, I slide my arms around him and give him a hug.

He squeezes me and kisses the top of my head. “I’m so proud of you for even considering it. You’re so brave. Look how far you’ve come. Jumping off bridges! Going on a ship around the country! Living in the UK will be a breeze.”

I sniff and rub my nose as he pulls away. “Thank you.”

“Better to regret something you’ve done than something you’ve not done.” He smiles and walks away.

“Joel? How’s Zoe?”

“Yeah, not going there.” He disappears outside.

I chuckle and go back to the washing up. Some things don’t change.

*

The next day, Linc, Fraser, Joel, and I all drive to Christchurch, then fly back to Wellington on the same charter flight. Linc cancels his flight on Monday, and he invites me to stay with him in his hotel, which I decide to take him up on.

It takes me just under forty-eight hours to come to a decision.

We’re lying in bed late on Tuesday evening after a particularly enthusiastic lovemaking session, looking out at the stars popping out on the night sky. I’m lying on my back, and he’s resting his head on my shoulder, tracing his fingers across my belly and up between my breasts while I stroke down his spine.

I bring my hand up to his head and run my fingers up the short hair on the back of his head, then sink them into the longer strands on top. “I’ve made my decision,” I tell him.

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