Page 40 of Bidding War

“Very good timing.”

Lucky me. I walk to her, crossing the killing field to reach her. There is something unsettling about walking through the space where I killed a man. Like I expect his ghost to come at me or something like that. I have never been superstitious in my life, but for some reason, it feels sacrilegious to be walking where he died. Odd, that.

“June?”

She jumps and lets out a squeak. Right. Don’t sneak up on the woman who was just attacked. I’m an idiot.

“Sorry for that. We have to go handle the?—"

“Haddock?” she asks.

That’s my girl. Catching on fast is a specialty of hers. “Yeah. But I want you upstairs—Moss, should she do something special with her clothes or anything?”

To my surprise, he keeps his voice soft when speaking to her. It’s like he’s trying not to spook her after everything she has gone through tonight. “No. Nothing special to be done. Wash like usual. Throw away after wash, if you like, miss.”

She doesn’t make eye contact with him, but she nods all the same. “I’ll go up … do I need to spray anything else?”

I glance at Moss, who shakes his head. “No, baby. You can go up now. Thank you for your help. That was brave.”

At that, she gives me a mildly annoyed look. She whispers, “I didn’t have a choice. He’s scary.”

“Right now, though, he’s on our side. Let's be glad for that.”

Her smile comes in at the edges. It’s only a little, but it makes me feel better. “Yeah. I guess so.”

I might be pushing it, but I have to try. “When this is done, I’ll come check on you, okay?”

“I’d like that.”

Three simple words that mean the world to me. I shouldn’t be thinking of my love life right now. I killed a man. That has weight, and it should. But just hearing that she wants me to come to see her after everything is said and done is enough to make my heart lighter in spite of Green Sweater.

“It’ll be a while. Sleep if you can.”

Her impertinent laugh tells me that’s not happening.

I escort her to the elevator and watch as the doors close. Moss says, “We must hurry. Haddock stinks fast when dead, I do not want my van to reek of death.”

22

JUNE

Ican’t stop shaking. I hadn’t noticed it until I tried to press the button to my floor. But my finger shook so badly that it was blurry. Once I managed to press the button, the doors made Anderson’s face vanish, and that made the shaking so much worse. By the time I reach my door and try to put the key in the lock, I can’t.

I force myself to take a deep breath, but the air passing through my throat hurts. There’s a lump there. Hot, nagging. Telling me to cry. But if I do that now, then I’ll never get into my home. I close my eyes and feel the lock with my fingertips. Gentling the key’s tip into the hole, the notches on the inside feel familiar as metal fits into metal.

Home. I am home.

I am safe.

The thought makes me laugh maniacally as I turn the doorknob. Am I losing my mind? Maybe. But it doesn’t scare me like I thought it would. After everything I’ve been through tonight, a little madness feels appropriate.

Necessary, even. How the fuck else am I supposed to get through all of this?

Nothing makes any sense. Madness might save me for a while.

Well, madness and a shower.

I head for my bathroom, then clarity strikes with a vengeance. I bolt for my front door, throwing all the locks and the chain. In all my years of living alone, I’ve never forgotten to lock at least one of them behind me, and tonight is the time I pick to do so? Fuck.