Page 7 of Bad Duke

“Fuck!” I grip the edge of my desk to ground myself and stop myself from chasing after her, dragging her back and ensuring all that purity is fucked right out of her. Instead, I type her name into the search engine of my laptop and when that pretty, little face pops up I take some time scrolling through the pictures on her social media accounts. They are mostly of her and her brother, then I come across one of her standing outside some dance school in a tracksuit. I click on the link that's tagged to it and it leads me straight to its website. Olivia is right there on the homepage. Wearing a tight, pink leotard and tutu that matches. She’s standing beside a bunch of kids with a huge beam on her face, one that embeds itself right in my chest. I quickly close the tab and slam my laptop shut because I can feel her clawing her way into my head.

Picking up the notepad with her name and number on, I study it hard, trying to convince myself to do the right thing. I should screw this up and throw it away, at least give the poor girl a chance to think about what she’s offering.

But it’s too late for her now. I’d already made the decision when I realised the girl was telling me the truth. If anybody’s going to be taking Olivia Adams' virginity, it’s going to be me.

OLIVIA

“Are you insane?” My friend Elsie stares across the couch at me. It’s late for me to have shown up here, but I couldn’t face going home to an empty apartment.

“It would just be one night and this club he owns is professional. Elsie, I have to help Jamie get out of this,” I explain, trying to convince myself more than I am her that this isn’t that big a deal. It was desperation that had me blurting out the stupid suggestion and when he didn’t believe me I got so panicked I was prepared to prove it. I’m still confused by his reaction. For just a split second there was something almost gentle in his eyes when he made me look at him, something that turned deadly really quick.

I wasn’t prepared for how handsome and authoritative Alex Stanley would be. After meeting him I understand why my brother’s so scared. But in that moment we shared, he seemed to have some empathy.

“Yes, Olivia, but what if he actually takes you up on this offer, are you really going to give your virginity to some crusty old politician? And even if you do, how do you suppose you’ll find your brother and convince him to come back? He’s on the run. He thinks this guy wants him dead,” she points out, bringing me back to reality with a huge crash.

“I don’t know, Elsie, but at least I’d know he was safe.” This is what you get for going into something without a well-thought-through plan. What was I actually expecting this man to do when I turned up tonight? Accept my apology? Forgive my brother? I may be naïve to a lot, but I’m not stupid. I should have known better.

“Liv, do you really think this guy would have Jamie killed?” she checks. “He’s not exactly a low-profile figure. Everyone knows who he is. There’s even a woman who does a weekly podcast about him.”

“You didn’t see how scared Jamie was.” Dread sits heavy in my chest when I think about how scared he looked. I couldn’t bear anything bad happening to him. “I know what I’m prepared to do sounds crazy. But it’s just sex. Jamie’s spent his whole life looking out for me. I can do this,” I assure her, fixing a brave smile on my lips.

“If it’s just sex, why are you still a virgin?” Elsie looks unconvinced and I get that she doesn’t understand. To most people, it may seem strange, but most people haven’t had the life me and Jamie did. Growing up, I had no time for meeting boys or having fun. Our mum was sick. Our dad was always absent and good for nothing. Jamie left school at sixteen and started making whatever money he could. I always knew what he did wasn’t legal. I even helped him hide it from Mum so she wouldn’t worry.

Back then it was nothing like what he’s got himself involved in with Alex. Jamie always found just enough to pay our rent and keep us fed. I spent all the time that I wasn’t at school, at home taking care of Mum, but once a week on a Saturday morning Mrs Finch, from downstairs, would come sit with her so I could go to ballet class. Miss Devon, who owned the school, took pity on me. She never charged me any money because she knew I had none. She even collected together some hand-me-down kits so I could look like the others. It was thanks to her that I earned myself a scholarship to one of the most prestigious dance schools in London, but I never had the time for anything out of teaching hours. I never got to train like the other dancers. I couldn’t dedicate myself the way they did. It meant that I missed out on auditions and all those opportunities that I’d dreamed of. But I don’t regret it. All that time I got to spend with Mum was precious. We’d talk for hours and watch ballet concert DVDs on repeat. I’d put on shows just for her because she was the only audience I needed.

When she passed away all my focus went into becoming a dance teacher. I remember the kindness of Miss Devon and liked the idea of giving something back. Unfortunately, her kindness didn’t do her any good. She ended up having to sell the school to her sister when she ran into financial troubles. But she still stayed on to teach, she even managed to secure me a job after her sister took over.

“Liv.” Elsie snaps me out of my thoughts and brings me back to the here and now.

“I don’t like this, you're not the type of girl who sells her body in some high-end sex club.” She laughs. “You teach ballet to kids, and if Madame Riverty found out?—”

“She’s not going to find out.” I interrupt her, shuddering at the thought. Miss Devon's sister is nothing like her. She’s a battleaxe. “This place guarantees discretion. And it’s one time, Elsie. One time to save my brother's life.” It doesn’t seem so bad if you don’t think about it too hard. “Look, I have to go.” I stand up and make my way to the door.

“Wait, you should stay here tonight. You don’t want to go back to an empty apartment.”

“I have to, what if Jamie comes back?” I hear the hope in my voice and I can tell by Elsie’s sad smile that she doesn’t share it with me.

“Good night.” I return that smile before letting myself out and heading for home. I haven’t got enough money for a taxi, so I walk. It's not far from here to our apartment block, only a few streets. Jamie’s always telling me not to walk alone around here after dark, but he’s not here to call me out on it. I have no idea where he is, and that terrifies me.

I get to my apartment building and smile when I see Eric curled up by the door in his sleeping bag.

“Late for you to be out, ain’t it?” He greets me with a toothless grin.

“I was just hanging out with a friend.” I search around in my handbag for some loose change, managing to collect together a few coins. “Have you eaten today?” I ask, crouching down and placing them in the old man’s hand.

“Aye, I ate.” He tries giving them back.

“Well, it isn’t much, but it assures you eat something tomorrow.” I smile as I stand back up and open the door.

“You're a nice girl, you know. Too nice for a world like this one,” he calls after me, and I roll my eyes and smile to myself as I start climbing the stairs.

Once I’m inside I know there’s no chance of me getting any sleep. So I pick out one of Mum’s old Catherine Cookson books and take it to bed. My eyes read over the same sentence at least twenty times and I don’t take in a single word. All I can think about is him. The man who wants to hurt my brother and his dark, wicked eyes that looked as if they held some pain of their own. The way his deep voice made the hairs on my neck stand up, and how a tiny, fucked-up part of me was disappointed that he didn’t touch me back in his office. It’s disturbing, and not what I should be focusing on right now. I should be figuring out a way to deal with this offer I made him. Elsie is right, I really don’t think I could withstand a man, who I don’t know, touching me or putting his cock inside me. Which makes the disappointment I felt earlier even harder to understand. I give up on the book and slide my hand into the front of my panties. Trying to envision the faceless man who I’d be expected to give myself to.

I wonder if he’d want me to enjoy it? If he’d take his time and be gentle with me like a gentleman should? My finger strokes against my clit and my mouth goes dry when it’s Alex Stanley’s face that I see and his hand that I feel touching me. I like that vision so much that I let it stay. My tongue licks my lips as I slowly push one of my fingers inside myself. I doubt the man who I met tonight would even know how to be gentle. He’d be savage and brutal. He wouldn’t care if I wanted it or if I liked it. He’d take me because he could. My finger moves faster, and much easier when I become wet at the thought of him on top of me, pinning me down and having no remorse in taking my innocence, and when my stomach starts to tighten, a thrill dances over my skin. It’s those fierce, wicked eyes that stare at me as I come all over my finger.

“You're pathetic.” I shake my head and laugh at myself when I get my breath back. Alex Stanley would never look twice at a girl like me. I saw the girls who were hanging out at that club tonight and he could have whichever one he wanted. All I can hope to get from that man is a chance to save my brother's life.

ALEX

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