Page 63 of The Blame Game

“So you paid him?”

“Yeah. Charlie had a lot of debt from his anorexia hospitalizations—”

“Fucking America,” Dom said, disgusted. “Your country’s healthcare system is a joke.”

“I know.” Dustin sighed. “But Charlie needed money and I had plenty of it. So Wade and I talked him into staying married to me.”

“But you love each other now, right?” Dustin pressed. Because if the way they looked at each other, if the way they interacted now, was fake, Dom was going to have to admit that he had no idea what love was.

And that Dustin had missed his calling and should have been an A-level actor instead of a pro hockey player.

“Absolutely! We’re madly in love now. But do you want to know what took us from a fake relationship to real, lasting love?”

“No.” Though Dom could guess what the answer was going to be.

“Communication. Vulnerability.”

Dom rubbed his hands across his face. “Ugh, I was afraid you were going to say that.”

Dustin huffed. “Look, I’m not saying it was easy. I had to open up to Charlie about my worries about the team and never feeling good enough, and that I’m not doing enough for you guys—”

“What the hell?” Dom looked at him. “You’re … you’re the most considerate, thoughtful, involved captain I’ve ever had!”

“Knowing your former captains … that doesn’t surprise me. But that also makes it a rather low bar.”

Dustin wasn’t necessarily wrong.

“Anyway, I have made some mistakes. Like with La Bouche. And yes, it all worked out but I could have cost us that Cup win in ‘21, Dom. If I’d let my ego continue to—”

“Well, you didn’t.”

“I didn’t. But either way, it was something I was very unhappy about and I didn’t share that with anyone. But sharing that with Charlie made him comfortable enough to share the abuse from his mom and the neglect from his dad and the anorexia. It was a huge turning point for us. It was when we went from being two people who stayed married for a common cause to two people who were building a real relationship.”

“Huh.”

“If you’re fine with where all of the relationships in your life are, then don’t change anything you’re doing. But I don’t think that’s the case for you, Dom. I think you want to be closer to people. You just don’t trust that they won’t betray you.”

Dom swallowed thickly. “Well, you know why.”

“I do. And your ex was an asshole. Threatening to out you, that’s unconscionable.”

“I hurt Christian too. Not coming out … making him feel like I was ashamed of him …”

“I’m sure you did. But that doesn’t excuse what he did. He had the option to end the relationship without retaliating.”

Dom stayed silent.

“I’m just saying, you have perfectly valid reasons for being closed off. But if you want the relationships in your life to be better, you have to work on that. You have to risk being hurt again.”

Dom nodded, unsure of what to say. Unsure of what he even wanted.

Dustin patted his thigh. “For what it’s worth, you took the first step with Matty and me last fall. And tonight’s good too.”

“I guess.”

Dom stared up at the ceiling. He didn’t feel good at the moment. Throbbing pain aside, he felt churned up, body roiling with tension and anger and a whole lot of other things he wasn’t even sure how to name.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

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