Page 220 of The Blame Game

“Well, it’s a hard life for SAPs!” Charlie shook his head. “I do work but I had the advantage of working for a design firm that has a location here in Toronto. And my husband is the team’s captain and has spoken openly about wanting to retire as a Fisher Cat so I didn’t have to worry that we’d get traded soon. But the average player’s partner or spouse has to deal with loss of income, loss of a job. They’re at the whim of being traded at any point. They’re often financially dependent on their spouse or partner.”

“Sure,” Tad said. “But that’s supporting someone you love. We’re talking about paying for sex. Sex should be sacred and—”

Charlie snorted. “According to whom? It can be, absolutely. It can be sacred and meaningful and incredibly emotional. But let’s be honest, millions of people have casual, meaningless sex for all sorts of reasons.”

“I was not in love with Nico Arents when we first got involved,” August said drily. “The first time we had sex was not meaningful or emotional, and it certainly wasn’t sacred. However, no money exchanged hands. Why does that make it better?”

Tad looked flabbergasted. “So you’re implying that sex work can be meaningful and emotional?”

Charlie shrugged. “I can’t personally attest to that because I’ve never done sex work or paid for it, but why is that impossible? Money doesn’t inherently cheapen the act.”

“But it’s transactional. A person is selling their body for sex.”

Shea cleared his throat. “I sold my body for hockey. Isn’t that similar?”

Catherine frowned. “Can you explain what you mean?”

He nodded, explaining his knee injuries and making the comparison he’d made to Dom before. “Why is one socially acceptable while the other isn’t?” he pressed when he was done.

“Sex, love and money are all tied up together,” Charlie added before either Catherine or Tad could get a word in. “And Shea’s right, people have all kinds of expectations about what is appropriate but I think we need to take a look at where those ideas are coming from.”

“Honestly, I think this conversation has veered a little off-topic,” Catherine said, clearing her throat.

Charlie gave her an innocent smile. “I get very passionate about certain topics. You understand.”

Tad chuckled, relaxing. “We can certainly see that.”

Catherine nodded. “But to circle around to what we were discussing earlier, it seems like you’re implying that the life of a SAP is difficult?”

“First of all, I don’t think I can speak for anyone else,” Charlie said. “And I’m the first to acknowledge that I lead a very privileged life. When Dustin and I met, I was drowning in medical debt and living in a very small apartment, worried that every check would bounce. I now have a beautiful house, drive an adorable pink Jeep, and live a very charmed life in many ways. But I think only looking on the surface of a SAP’s life ignores some of the very real difficulties that many face.”

“Can you give us some examples?” Catherine asked.

“Well, many of us give up our careers,” August pointed out. “My situation was a little unusual because I was a referee, but it’s very common overall. As Charlie said, many spouses and partners have to give up work when their player gets traded and it can be very difficult for them to find a new position once they’re in a new location. For journeyman players, they could easily be traded half a dozen times or more. That kind of instability is very hard on the person they’re with.”

The conversation easily flowed from there.

Antoni mentioned some of the struggles he’d faced as a single parent and Charlie tied that into how often players were gone and Elena’s experiences raising six kids and by the time they reached the end of the conversation, Tad and Catherine were nodding their agreement.

“So, Charlie,” she said. “It sounds like you’re quite passionate about this topic too. Do you have anything else you’d like to add?”

“Well,” he said. “We’re still working out some of the details, but I’m creating a league-wide network of support for the SAPs. It can be very isolating moving to a new city. I’ve been extremely lucky because this team is amazingly supportive but I want to ensure that all spouses and partners have access to that kind of community. It’ll be open to people of any gender and we’re working on an app where people can connect, share their experiences, ask questions or get help navigating a situation.”

“Social media for SAPs?” Catherine asked with a laugh.

“Well, hopefully we’ll have a catchier name than that by the time we finish. But yes, that’s the general idea.”

Tad nodded. “I think my wife would have loved that when I was playing.”

Charlie beamed. “It will be available to alumni as well. So people with years or decades of experience can chime in too.”

“Well that sounds wonderful,” Catherine said warmly. “And thank you for the spirited discussion earlier.”

“Any time.” Charlie winked. “Thank you for having us.”

Everyone said their goodbyes and after they left the studio and walked into the warm spring air, Shea let out a sigh of relief.

“Thank you, guys. You were amazing in there.”

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