Page 93 of Of Daggers and Deceit

His lips met mine in a featherlight kiss before he took a step back, still lingering, holding my hand in his own. He cast me one final, apologetic look before allowing my hand to drop back to my side and turning, walking briskly from the room.

Tonight was the last night our shield was breached. Over the next few hours, our Alphas would be readying themselves to defend the Haven for the final night of the year. I had no idea where Zander would be going tonight. He rarely told me, and he never spoke about it afterwards. I knew better than to question him on it. Besides, I had my own job to do. A bargain to fulfill.

Hushed tones reached my ears, drawing me carefully closer.

“You know what to do tonight. Wait until my Rose goes to sleep. It is a shame she chose to breach our shield. Her power presents such an uncontrollable problem for what we are building here, and I can’t have her ruining it. I trust you to make it look incidental,” Zander directed Sly, the subtle sounds of the elevator door shuttering closed in the background. I couldn’t hear Sly’s reply, if he replied at all, underneath the thump of my heartbeat bellowing its rage in my ears.

I knew they were talking about her.

Raya.

Panic wormed its way up my throat, and I fought to suppress it. Collateral was not going to be enough for tonight. I needed an immediate solution.

She would have to become part of the plan.

I composed myself again before Sly rounded the corner to stare at me. I raised my eyebrows at his blank stare and tilted my head in confusion, pretending I hadn’t heard anything.

“So…the plan remains?” I asked cautiously. The void in his emotions, emulated by his blank expression, caused a spike in my stress. Would he do it?

He blinked once and nodded. “Yes, the plan remains, Riles.”

I continued to assess him, his mannerisms slightly off and his humorous nature suspiciously absent.

“I would like Raya to be added to our plan. I want her out of the Haven.”

Relief skittered across his face before he acknowledged my request, a reassurance that he did not like what he’d been ordered to do. Some of the tension fell away from my shoulders.

“Okay, we will add Raya to the plan at your request, just as long as we get the stone so I can execute the remainder of it here when she leaves.” His voice was firm and direct, and I didn’t miss how he’d pointedly said he would be completing the rest of our plan to access Zander’s mysterious space beneath our home. I’d told him so many times over that I could do it just fine, but he said he would tell me everything he found afterwards.

I wasn’t prepared to argue with him again, given our plan for tonight. It was time sensitive and an enormous risk for us both to take, potentially putting us both in a position to be exposed as conspiring against Zander. I had initially wanted to do this on my own, but he had again insisted on coming with me as protection, as an ally and a friend.

My own anxiety was eating away at my insides; I couldn’t imagine how he would be feeling.

“I’ll be right back.” I darted to my room to quickly throw off my dress and haul on some longer pants, a tight top, and some sneakers. The sneakers were white and likely to look like shit after this, but I had eight other pairs, and my black ones were suspiciously missing. I kept my hair down, a blackened halo around me.

I told Zander earlier that I would likely go up to the rooftop to enjoy some quiet time. Windswept hair was not likely to give me away tonight. If anything, it would re-affirm my excuse.

Sly stood when I moved out of my room. His movements were slow and dragging, his expression plagued with worry. I moved closer, eager to reassure him that everything would be okay. It had to be.

He stepped closer, inhaling a deep, long breath, and closed his eyes.

“You always smell so wonderful. It’s almost nostalgic for me. Exactly like my mum’s garden used to be, brimming with life and new growth. It brings me the deepest sense of peace.” He exhaled, his voice so sweet and subdued. His facial muscles slowly loosened to fully relax, his broad shoulders slackening.

I stayed immobile, as patient as ever, allowing him the time he needed to process what we were about to do.

I personally wasn’t allowing myself to think too hard about what I’d already set into motion. I’d committed to it this far, and I needed to go all the way. I didn’t have the liberty of choice, not unless I intended to perish within these walls.

He opened his eyes and gazed into my mine, stepping closer to me, bringing his hand up to gently cup my cheek. Instinctively, I leant into his touch, my heart unable to deprive myself of this moment, knowing that was all this will would be: a stolen moment in time.

“I just have to take this one moment for myself, Riley. This one moment of doing something just for me, knowing that, after tonight, everything will change. We are like two trains running alongside each other, forever close but never intertwining. In this moment, this one, selfish moment, I want to believe we could have been, had we been gifted the opportunity to try.” He spoke the words in the faintest whisper.

When I looked up at him, my heart ached from the sorrow staring back at me.

In another life, I could have seen where this thing with him would lead. I wanted to be selfish too, if it meant I could have him. Still, I knew it would come at a hefty price, because what Zander wanted, he always got, and I wasn’t prepared to sacrifice him.

“I would have fought for you, Riley.”

A single tear escaped me, the only one I would ever allow.

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