Page 63 of Of Daggers and Deceit

“But only if you ask me, Ray.” His voice was softer this time, dancing around the edges of everything I had survived tonight. Every wall I’d ever erected to keep him out shattered.

“Stay,” I whispered, too quiet, though he heard it all the same. He turned around and shuffled forward before peeling back the covers, fitting his long, lean body in behind mine.

He dragged me closer, and I nuzzled into him, my back to his stomach as peace eased the tension in my limbs. Lips touched my neck in a featherlight kiss, his hands sliding lower to rest against my stomach.

“Rest, Raya. I will be here,” he murmured.

I felt so wired, my emotions roiling inside me as I remembered the others out on the field, the currents seizing my control. I didn’t know if I could sleep.

“Are the others okay?” I asked, the silence in the room around us heavy. There had been so much devastation.

His fingers tensed on my stomach before releasing again.

“They will be okay,” he replied, though there was sorrow in his voice. He didn’t bother to elaborate, neither of us in a position to talk about the why or how of this night. I didn’t ask how many Omegas were kidnapped; a failure was a failure.

I rolled over to face him, my hands falling to rest on his chest as I peered at him. Everything was Zander’s fault. Everything.

The more I looked at him, held onto him, the more I realised there was so much at stake if Riley and I were caught.

I breathed in. The only thing left to lose now would be time, because it rapidly felt like I was running out.

This Alpha before me only had kindness and love in the depths of his soul, and I knew now that I would never settle for anyone different, not when he had set the bar so very high, and not when he was the only shifter here who cherished me, all of me.

In every moment, I choose my life story, and I knew now that there was never going to be any story for me other than this one: a future where Bodhi was a huge part of my life for as long as he would have me.

His eyes were closed, his breathing steady, but I knew he wasn’t asleep. I could feel it in the twitch of his fingers at my hips, the restlessness of his limbs as he shifted. He wanted to see what I would do. He lay there and waited to see if I would reciprocate.

So, with my pulse thundering in anticipation, I trailed my hands up his chest and slowly curved my arms around his neck, moving my body closer until my chest brushed against his.

His eyes opened lazily, tracking me with budding hope that sparkled in the amber tones of his irises that I swear were so bright, they seemed to almost glow.

His hands drifted lower, to just the top of my ass, before resting there as if unsure. I chose that moment to lift my head just that little bit more, my nose brushing against his, his breaths coming in quicker.

“You don’t have t—” he started, but I cut him off with the press of my lips to his.

It was like an exhale of relief the moment his mouth parted, welcoming me with a low groan that seemed to vibrate in my mouth, sparking a decadent fire within. He kissed me with a passion I could scarcely match, like he’d been waiting a lifetime for my permission, barely hanging on.

His hands drifted that little bit lower, cupping my ass before he rolled me on top of him, a bold move I found I liked.

His mouth plundered mine, his tongue tangling with my own as he tasted me and moaned his approval. He was ravenous, and I was entirely unsatisfied, frustrated because I had denied myself for so long, and I hadn’t noticed until this very moment how much I ached for him.

But kissing him didn’t feel like enough. Not now.

Not when I wanted everything he had to give, because I had so much of my life to lose, and I wanted his touch, his scent, against every inch of my skin to give me a new memory of tonight—a better one.

Especially when there was a chance I could die any day from now.

I pulled away from his mouth and ripped my shirt off over my head as his chest heaved, his hands now resting on the top of my thighs, waiting.

His hands drifted, my skin pebbling beneath a shiver the higher they lifted.

“I’ve wanted this for too long,” he whispered, his thumb dragging against the skin of my stomach. I trailed my hands down his chest, enjoying the feel of him beneath my fingertips.

“But I can’t do this with you.” I froze.

“I need you to want me. I need you to choose me every single day, Raya. I can’t go back and forth with you if nothing eventuates from it. I can’t do it anymore.”

My heart hurt from his comment, knowing I had caused him pain, knowing I cared for him and had pushed him away despite it.

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