Page 55 of Broken Wolf

“Your blood pups would never be as strong. And we have never lost a pup as a Dorcus because we are so strong. So you will not suffer what many wolves suffer with the loss of miscarriage. Gods willing, but we have never had an infected Dorcus, so I should not say that. That was wrong of me to add.”

She gave me an apologetic look, but I waved it off. I understood where her head had been.

“So yes, you accept more with her job and other men in her life,” she wrapped up. “But you focus on that, and it’s always about what you give up. Sera and others in her life are always focused on how much they receive that they could not get from others and need to appreciate. That is why you are a good man but selfish for a good man.”

Hagan was quiet for several minutes as we kept working on food with Eva asking me questions here and there. Finally, he stood and moved into my view. “Is that what you sensed and tried to tell me?”

“No, not like that at all,” I answered. “Eva and the other sirens are a whole other level of what they sense. I can’t—what I see as a clairvoyant conflicts and messes up what my siren could get, and I can’t get into it all yet. I don’t think until I’m like a decade old as a wolf. I keep seeing more as a clairvoyant as I become more powerful, and until that calms down, it wouldn’t be smart.”

“Your siren agrees?” Eva checked, praising me when I nodded.

“I’ve gotten images and vibes from you like if you have to come on a certain day because Carter has already taken Saturday then you should get whatever position you want,” I told him. “Or something like that. So maybe the end thought of what Eva is saying. If I’ve been working too much and you haven’t been able to catch me, you get to pick where we eat. That vibe.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, looking destroyed.

I opened my mouth but then closed it, focusing on what I was doing and then trying again. “I don’t know that you need to be. I don’t disagree with you. It is hard on you that I work so much and that I’m with other men.”

“Yeah, but it’s like I throw it in your face and that’s not okay,” he rasped.

“But you’re not. It’s not your fault that I pick things up.”

“No, but I do get annoyed at you when you wear your ring around me, and that’s unfair now that I know I’m a selfish prick,” he seethed… But not at me. He moved over by me in a flash and kissed my hair and then was at the door. “I’m sorry, Sera.”

“You are a good man, Hagan Cooney,” Eva told him firmly. “We would not allow you around her if you were not. This is not to tell you that you are a bad man or not worthy of her. We all need adjustments on how we see things or to fix our perception, to realize we’re blessed. Time to realize how blessed you are.”

“Thank you. Really.” He left and I glanced at her and sighed.

I didn’t know if that was better or going to blow up.

She simply shrugged. “My mother had the same talk with one of mine years after he became mine. We all need to be set back on the tracks and readjusted at times. I did the same to you tonight as well. You need to stop being so damn negative, Seraphine. I know the world is dark and horrible too many days. You have had too much darkness in your life.

“But the people who love you do not fill in the blank with negativity. I’ve seen you do it with your mother as well. I will not say you need to assume the positive. That is not life either and too much. For the love of the gods, at least one in four times pick a positive option for your own sanity. I promise it’s normally better than you think from the people who love you.”

Fair enough.

Hell, it sounded nice.

15

I might have had the 4th off from work, but there was so much to do for the pack that I didn’t have a second to relax really. I interviewed six different prey shifters for the position that I had talked with Reagan about. They were all refugees we’d allowed into the pack who’d been staying in Greece.

Three would work well, and I was tempted to hire them all.

Honestly, I was.

The twins could use one. So could Simone now. And Brett with all of the additional houses that I had added.

Basically, everyone needed more help and to not be broken.

Plus, I needed someone to handle this program I was initiating with the trade school. We had gobs of interest, and after talking with the Alphas under me, we were going to limit it to a hundred the first semester.

We were also going to have a waitlist for those interested and who got their credentials together and application to the school ready. That way if someone didn’t meet the requirements or bailed on the program, someone else could step in and take the opportunity. Twenty from NYC and New Jersey, twenty from Sioux Falls, twenty from Chicago, twenty from Milwaukee, ten from Grand Rapids, and ten from Des Moines.

I was the Alpha of them now even if I was pretty hands off with how their Alpha had been running things for a long time. But he only wanted to be the Alpha another ten years maybe, so… I was the big boss and they were a part of this.

We really needed to stop expanding. That was the answer, but everyone needed us to. It just seemed like so much could fall apart and fast if we weren’t careful and that worried me.

A lot.