Page 52 of Finding You

He reached his hand out before he realized he was doing it. His palm touched Kylen’s cheek, and warmth rushed through him. Kylen leaned in, then turned his face and nuzzled his nose against him.

“Do you want to kiss me again?” Kylen asked very quietly.

Yes. God yes. He leaned in. “Tell me you’ll be okay with it in the morning if we do this now. You’re not yourself.”

“I’m myself,” Kylen said, grabbing Dallas by the wrist and squeezing. “I’m sad. I’m lonely. But I haven’t lost who I am. Or what I want. But I don’t want to push you into something you don’t want just to make me feel better.”

Dallas hesitated. He did want it. More than anything. He wanted to touch this man, to spread him out beneath him and make his next tears ones of pleasure. It wasn’t a new feeling, but it was one he hadn’t had in a long, long while. And he didn’t know how long it would be before he felt it again.

“I’m still figuring myself out,” he said. “I can’t lie and say I don’t want you. I’ve been thinking about you for a while now. But I don’t know what it means.”

Kylen looked up at him through his long lashes. “Will you regret it in the morning?”

“No.” And he meant that. “I’m not curious about being with you. I just can’t promise anything more than this tonight. I don’t…there are things I’m trying to figure out about myself that…I don’t quite understand.” That was a lie. He did understand. But he was terrified this was a onetime thing and that when it was over, Kylen was going to want him more, and Dallas was going to want him less.

And then one of them would have to compromise, and resentment would build. And at some point, Kylen would end up hating him as much as Katie did.

The thought made him sick to his stomach.

“Hey,” Kylen said softly. He slid his fingers between Dallas’s and squeezed. “I’m not asking for a proposal. I’m not asking for anything you’re not willing to give me. But if you want me, and I want you, then just for tonight, let’s be selfish.”

Let’s be selfish. Dallas wanted to laugh. And maybe cry. Katie called him selfish, which had stung because he’d spent so long trying to twist himself into shapes that made her happy, and he’d failed. The thought was abjectly terrifying.

And yet, the way Kylen said it, it sounded so simple. So easy. All he’d have to do is reach out and take this thing Kylen was offering him.

So what could it hurt?

Chapter Fifteen

KYLEN

Kylen thought he’d broken Dallas with the way his face was going on a journey.

He wasn’t sure Dallas was even aware of how expressive he was. It was like art, watching him work through everything. Kylen had been pretty damn sure for a while now that Dallas was into him. But he hadn’t been sure Dallas realized it.

The kiss had proven him wrong though. He knew the little scoring quip had been a self-defense mechanism because the way Dallas had kissed him had been so very, very real. And the way Dallas had held him as soon as he got in—it wasn’t just friendly. It was different.

And Kylen wanted to lean in.

It was clear Dallas was trying to figure himself out, and Kylen most certainly wasn’t going to push, but he was lonely and turned on, and he could tell Dallas was feeling the same way. Maybe it would end in disaster once they both climbed out of the pits they were in, but Kylen was willing to take the risk.

He’d done it with Dani, and now they were best friends. This could very well be just like that.

“Nothing will change between us if you say no,” Kylen finally said into the silence that had stretched on and on. He tucked himself back inside his boxers. “I will never, ever make you feel like you’re being punished because of something you don’t want to do.”

Dallas swallowed heavily and reached out a hand like he wanted to stop him, but he still didn’t touch. “It’s not that.” Except there was a hint of a lie in his tone. “I don’t want to let you down.”

“You won’t.” Dallas’s breathing became a little unsteady as Kylen leaned in. “You won’t,” he said again.

Dallas licked his lips, then nodded and surged forward. Their lips met, frantic, sloppy, uncertain. Dallas seemed on the verge of hysterical, like he wasn’t sure what to do. It was a far cry from the sexy, confident man who had taken what he wanted on Kylen’s porch.

Was this his fault? Had Kylen fucked up?

“Relax,” Kylen murmured. He gentled the kiss with several tiny pecks, and Dallas began to relax in his arms. “You want this, right?”

“I really want this.”

“So take it. I’m here. I’m yours.”