Page 76 of Líadan's Code

“There’s no way this won’t stain our souls after this,” I remind him. “Think about the fallout. We’re playing God, deciding who lives and who dies.”

“Remember what some of these people did to you, what they wanted to do to Layla,” Brendan growls. “I don’t know who the bastards were that were there the night your father tried to ruin you, but you fought and clawed your way back to me. Back to yourself. Why do you think you don’t deserve to be happy?”

Helplessly, I gesture toward Jordan’s sleeping form. I don’t recommend crying and sucking down oxygen while your throat is sore. It fucking sucks. I’m a damn mess.

“Baby, look at you,” Brendan says, leaning forward as he catches one of my tears. Lifting his mask, he sucks it off his thumb. “I never thought I’d taste your tears again. Maybe that’s fucked up, but I’m willing to own it.”

“I love you. Your black heart is as dark as mine,” I say softly. My eyes cut over to Jordan’s sleeping body as I take a deep breath, knowing how much this is going to hurt, but doing it anyway is important.

Jordan’s heart is too pure for us.

“That’s why we have to let him go, Brendan. We can’t drag him down with us.”

“Lía,” he growls but I shake my head. My gaze stares him down until he sags under the weight of it. “You love me…”

“I’ve always loved you,” I say with a small smile. My heart is already breaking as I promise to love Brendan forever while leaving Jordan the moment we’re clear to go. It feels heartless, but I can’t see any way that we’ll get a happy ending.

“You’re a part of me. Jordan will never let us go unless we take the choice away from him.”

Brendan scowls as he puts the mask over his face again. “Let the record stand that I don’t think this is going to go the way you think it will,” he grumbles. “Jordan is going to spank your ass for it, and I’ll enjoy watching your skin turn red for him.”

A ridiculous shiver trails down my spine. No, absolutely not. I can’t be turned on by a punishment when I’m leaving Jordan. I have a weakness for him, and I can’t afford to be weak. I have to hope his home with his nieces will be far enough away to keep everyone safe. Wanting to keep him with me was a lapse in judgment.

It’s certainly not safe by my side.

“If he can find us, he’s welcome to my ass,” I state before flushing. Ugh that’s not what I meant. “Never mind. Get some shuteye, because we’ll leave in an hour.”

“Three hours!” the old coot yells above us. Fuck me, there’s nothing wrong with his hearing.

“Yes, Sir,” I sigh, going back to using my oxygen mask. That should give me enough time to stop hacking, at least. The sun isn’t even up in the sky yet, we have time before we need to leave.

We may be able to keep all of our appointments too. Careful not to meet Brendan’s gaze even as his piercing green eyes stay on my face as he lays down, I force myself to think about all of the things I need to do today. Including finding a new place to live.

This may be the worst Tuesday of my entire life to date.

Jordan

My eyes feel heavy as I open them, groaning as I blink blearily.

“Don’t move too quickly now,” an older man grunts as he sits down in a chair beside me. It’s one of those doctor chairs on wheels so they can move around the room, reminding me I’m at a doctor’s home getting medical treatment.

“I feel as if I should hurt more than I do,” I mutter. There was so much glass in my back and side since my body inadvertently shielded Lía from where I was standing. I would much rather she be safe than hurt, so I’m happy I was there.

“You’re going to want to thank the really good drugs and medical grade cream for that,” Dr. Kurtz says with a smirk. His almost colorless eyes are grim as he crosses his arms, despite the smile that quickly drops off.

“What are you doing with the new leader of the Irish mafia, anyway? I wouldn’t call this a good life choice.”

“It’s a long story,” I sigh, propping myself up on my forearms. The basement medical area is empty, no other sounds echo, and I get a heavy feeling in my stomach. I recognize it as nausea, swallowing hard.

“They’re gone, aren’t they?”

“Yes,” he says. “She had an argument with Brendan before lighting out of here like her hair was on fire the moment she could. You were all kept here due to smoke inhalation.”

Well that explains the uncomfortable mask over my face.

I’m not having any trouble breathing now, so I pull off the mask. In fact, I can smell smoke on my skin from the fire, and I’m sure it’s permeating my pants and hair. Wonderful. I smell like a fucked up form of barbecue.

“Líadan,” I sigh, slowly easing myself into a sitting position. I can feel where the muscles in my back stretch from the stitches, but still don’t feel any pain. My mind is clear, I don’t feel drugged, so it must be the topical cream the doctor used.

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