Page 86 of Clash of Kingdoms

“But they won’t know I’ll be accompanied by an army of vampires and explosives.”

“You don’t have to do this.” He was doing it for me, even though I’d ended things.

His eyes hadn’t shifted. Hadn’t blinked. “Yes, I do.”

When his stare was too much, I shifted my gaze elsewhere. “Aurelias?—”

He moved into me, his hand cupping my face as his lips landed on mine, backing me up into the wall in a fluid motion.

I was instantly swept up in his embrace, and my lips moved with his on instinct. His affection was warm coffee on a winter morning, cold sheets on a summer day, rain to the rose garden outside the castle walls. The heat thawed my angry heart, and I pooled into a puddle on the floor at his feet.

But then reality came back to me, and I spoke against his lips. “Tell me why.” I pulled away to look at his face, to see his reaction because his expression was the only tell he had.

He stilled at the question.

“Tell. Me. Why.” My eyes shifted back and forth between his, knowing there was a secret guarded behind that strong gaze. He’d locked me out in the cold and barred the door. His heart had been blocked, and there was no way inside.

His eyes remained hard and impenetrable. His breathing had picked up slightly, and not because of the kissing. Conflict was written across his gaze, the internal debate exploding inside him. But he dropped his head and remained silent.

“Why won’t you tell me?”

His eyes remained on the floor.

“You would rather lose me than tell me the truth.”

He wouldn’t look at me.

“Aurelias.”

He inhaled a deep breath before he forced himself to look at me. “I can’t…”

“You can’t explain to me why you would rather feed from someone else? Why you preferred another woman instead of me? Why you would share something so intimate with someone who means nothing to you instead of the woman you’re risking your life and afterlife for?”

His eyes shifted away. “I just can’t.”

It hurt all over again. “This is how you want things to end?” I did my best to battle my tears, to suppress the heat that burned behind my eyes, but his refusal was like a knife in my heart. He either didn’t trust me or didn’t think I was worthy of his secrets.

“I never want this to end, Harlow. The last few days have been some of the worst of my life, and all I’ve wanted to do is run straight to you.” His eyes found mine again, steady once more. “My father is an asshole, and I found out that my mother’s soul is gone forever…”

“What do you mean, gone forever?”

He paused before he continued. “It’s a long story. But our enemy back at home was fueling their immortality with the souls of innocents. They call us monsters because we feed on blood, but the only soul we destroy is our own.”

“I’m sorry…” I didn’t understand the weight of his words, but his sadness was like ice in my heart. “And I’m sorry about your father too.”

His eyes were elsewhere now, staring past me out the window. “My father is an asshole because my mother was raped and murdered. I understand that’s something you just don’t get over. And knowing her soul is long gone and there’s no afterlife for her has fueled even more rage. I understand it…but I can barely tolerate it.”

My heart sank when he confided that horrible news to me, especially when he breezed over it so casually. “I—I didn’t know that.”

“It’s hard for me to talk about.”

“I’m sorry.” My words felt empty because they would never compensate for the weight of his pain. They were just air and nothingness, and his grief was as real as a solid piece of stone.

“I know you are.” His eyes found mine again.

“I don’t understand why you can confide this to me…but not what I need to know.”

His eyes were gone again. Shifted somewhere else instantly. “Because it’s infinitely more painful than what I’ve just told you.”

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