Page 81 of The Broken Prince

“This mission may claim my life. Or I may return with the information that will ensure our survival. You raised us to sacrifice our blood and our lives for our people. That’s what I’m doing. Somehow, you lost Father and carried on…but I couldn’t do that if it were Avice and Lila. I just…” I couldn’t finish the sentence, because that outcome was infinitely worse than my own death.

Her eyes lifted again. “Huntley will be furious.”

“I don’t care.”

“He’ll be furious with me for allowing this.”

“I’m the steward of HeartHolme—you are not. I have the autonomy to protect this kingdom as I see fit, and this is how to do it. I will not let them be conquered by an unconquerable enemy.”

“Huntley said the vampires may come.”

“You think I would risk our people for may?” I snapped. “They may come. Or they may not come. Or they may come when we’re all already dead. Mother, I know you agree with me, even though you refuse to admit it. If you weren’t so blinded by your favoritism, you would know that my decision is the right one.”

Her eyes shifted away when she couldn’t meet my gaze.

I waited for her to admit it, to say something.

She looked at me once more. “Please be careful, son. Losing your father was devastating, but losing a son…my heart would never heal. I’ve been fortunate to watch both of you grow into men I’m deeply proud of. I’m fortunate that I haven’t watched my sons pass on like other mothers have…”

“I’ll do everything I can to return.”

She gave a slight nod. “You should hurry. Because once Huntley arrives, you’ll lose your chance.”

“I know.” I stared at her, unsure what to say now that it might be the last time she would ever see me. I might die in the east, my body impossible to retrieve, buried somewhere in the barren dirt, hidden under the snow. “I’ll do my best to return to you.”

“And your family, Ian. They need you just as much.”

* * *

I stepped into our chambers, Avice ready for the day in a long-sleeved dress, her beautiful hair down one shoulder. She was still rigid around me, like she hadn’t gotten used to my sharing her space again. When she looked at me, her eyes didn’t sparkle like diamonds, like she loved me more than words could say. That sentiment was blocked by a cloudiness that had formed with my betrayal. But it was there, slowly coming through like the sun as the clouds parted. “I need to speak to you.”

She pivoted her body to face me fully, her eyes guarded.

We slept together side by side every night, and she allowed me to hold her in my arms, to keep her close as we passed the night. I wanted more, but I didn’t want to push for it. But now that I might not come back…I wished our nights had been different. “I’m leaving for the east.”

Her hesitancy disappeared at my announcement.

“I’m taking another rider with me to discover whatever I can.”

“Ian, I don’t like this—”

“I have to protect you and Lila. This is the only way I can.”

Her eyes softened like wilting rose petals. “It’s too dangerous—”

“Not as dangerous as doing nothing.”

She turned quiet, her eyes shifting back and forth in devastation.

I didn’t want to cause her pain, but it felt good to know she cared. That she still cared as much for me as she did before. That my betrayal would never be enough to stop her from loving me.

She inhaled a slow breath, a painful one. “Ian.” She moved into me, her hands seizing my cheeks, her lips on mine. It was a single, hard kiss, one packed with pain and longing. “Please come back to me.”

I rested my forehead against hers, my hands so tight on her body that I might never let go. “Nothing will stop me, baby.”

“I’m sorry…for everything.” She started to cry.

I slowly pulled away so our gazes could meet. “Don’t apologize to me—”

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