Page 48 of Hooking Up with the Hockey Player

He playfully swats my ass—not hard, though. “Then let’s arrange it.”

Grinning, I climb out of bed, feeling the weight of his eyes on me as I walk out of the room and into the bathroom where I turn on the shower.

A moment later, he’s behind me, crumpled tissues in one hand, his front to my back, leaning over and kissing me on the neck. “You look so pretty like this, all flushed and topless. You should get naked, though.”

“Oh, I should?” I toss over my shoulder, feeling the water temperature again.

“Mmhmm. We’re getting in the shower, after all.”

“That’s true.” It feels silly to be shy or self-conscious at this point—he’s naked, I’m topless, he’s had his fingers inside me—but I am anyway.

When I straighten, he turns me to face him, his hands resting on my hips, and he bends to kiss me lightly on the lips. It’s brief and sweet, and then he’s looking into my face, his expression serious. “You don’t have to. Join me in the shower, I mean. Or undress all the way. If you don’t want to.”

My cheeks heat, which is so ridiculous, but I really can’t help it. “No, it’s not that, it’s …”

“I get it,” he murmurs, drawing me in for a hug. “I know you’re shy. It’s okay. I feel like we’ve pushed several of your boundaries already. I can clean up, we can get dressed, and then we can watch a movie or something. Or I can leave if you prefer.”

“No!” The objection is immediate. And louder than I intended. I clear my throat, and when I chance a glance at him, he’s grinning. “I don’t want you to leave.”

“Okay. I won’t leave. But you still don’t have to shower with me if it makes you uncomfortable.”

My eyes stray to his chest, and I trace a finger over the hairs there. “No, I … I want to.” I’m being new Anna, right? Brave Anna, who’s not afraid to do things.

“Why don’t you get in first,” I say, stepping out of his hold. “I’ll get a towel down for you.”

He studies me for a beat as I do just that, but then, his voice light, just says, “Okay,” pulls open the shower curtain, and steps into the shower.

Having a few seconds to myself helps—even if we’re in the same room and he’s only behind a light green curtain. I just need a second to recenter, reconnect. This is what I want, though. I want to spend time with Troy. Be naked with Troy. Be less self-conscious about it.

But I think it’s kind of a fake it till you make it situation. With one more deep breath, I push my shorts and panties down my hips, picking them up from the floor and tossing them into my bedroom before grabbing two washcloths and climbing into the shower.

Troy’s broad back is facing me, the water sluicing down sculpted muscle, and yeah, this was definitely the right choice. He turns, smiling at me, running his hands through his wet hair and down his face to wipe away the water. “I like it when you look at me like that,” he murmurs.

“I like looking at you.” The words are more brazen than I can usually manage, and even though I feel myself blush, I tip my chin up, unwilling to showcase any more embarrassment than I can help. I can’t control my involuntary responses, but I can choose not to shrink away.

“God, you’re gorgeous,” he says, reaching for me. And I step into his arms, tipping my face up for his kiss, all lingering doubts washed away by his expression, his voice, his lips on mine.

As self-conscious and shy as I am, he’s entirely uninhibited, saying and doing whatever he wants, and it’s as natural for him as breathing.

It’d be nice to be that way. Maybe spending more time with him will let me achieve that magical ability. At the very least, I’ll eventually get more relaxed with him.

Of course, by the time that happens, he’ll be leaving.

I push that thought away. I know he’s not here forever. I know this isn’t permanent. The goal is to learn how to be this person—the one here who invites a man to her home and takes showers with him, the one who isn’t afraid to speak up for what she wants, to act on her impulses, to be present in this moment instead of worrying about the past or what might happen but hasn’t yet.

All I want right now is this. Him. Us.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Troy

After spending most of the day with Anna, it’s hard to know I won’t get to see her until her workday ends on Monday.

I stay at her place until fairly late Sunday evening, giving and receiving another orgasm after dinner, but when it’s clear she’s getting sleepy, I decide I should head back to the cabin. As much as I wouldn’t mind staying the night, that wasn’t planned ahead of time, and for my organized, plan-ahead Anna, I think that’s necessary. She dances around the idea of inviting me to stay over, but I can tell it isn’t something she feels really comfortable with. Not right now, anyway.

So I kiss her thoroughly and leave her wrapped in a soft robe, feeling unaccountably lonely as I drive back to the cabin.

The place is quiet, only the porch light and the dim light over the stove left on to light my way. I’m a little surprised that I don’t see Dozer and Jenny either in the living room or out on the back porch, though after their antics last night, at least they’re being respectful tonight. As much as I wanted to see Anna today, I was also glad to have an excuse to escape the tension.

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