Page 116 of Emperor of Wrath

“Fuck you,” I spit, shaking. “You don’t know?—”

“How many are on the list, Annika?—”

“Besides you?! ONE!” I spit venomously, my hands clenched to fists as my entire body shakes. “One, you fucking asshole!”

Kenzo’s face is incredulous as his jaw clenches. “What?”

I turn to walk away. “This conversation is over?—”

“The fuck it is.”

I jolt when he grabs my arm and yanks me around to face him. “Were you in a fucking relationship with that fucking?—”

“I was in PURGATORY with him!” I scream into his face, blasting away his furious expression and turning it to one of worry. “It was hell! You want to know if I was in a fucking relationship with him!?”

I’m screaming, but I don’t care. I’m shaking, but I feel nothing.

“Let’s review, Kenzo! I was twenty-two, homeless, and broke. He was in his forties, rich, and had all the power. I didn’t know what the words grooming or gaslighting meant, meanwhile he traded in them! I was told it was love and romance when I had bruises and bled. I was told what I felt didn’t matter, nor my consent!”

The tears start to stream down my face.

“I still make myself throw up in the shower sometimes to try and purge the memories. I still scrub my skin so hard it bleeds. Maybe it wasn’t three years of rape because technically I never said no,” I roar in his face as the world blurs, “but it was pretty fucking close!! You tell me, Kenzo!! Does that sound like a relationship to you!? Does that sound like that fuck was my fucking boyfriend, you arrogant, privileged piece of?—”

Suddenly, it’s like everything shatters. The walls inside crumble in a thunderous explosion. My heart wrenches.

…And Kenzo wraps me in his arms and pulls me tight to his chest.

“Princess,” he whispers hoarsely.

I break in two and melt against him. I cling to his shirt, sobbing into his chest as it all comes out. All the shame, all the self-loathing. All the ways I’ve called myself ugly and unlovable.

It all comes out as the walls come crashing down.

“I’m so fucking sorry, Annika,” he chokes into the top of my head, holding me so tightly that the air squeezes from my lungs.

But I want that. I need it. I need the raw power and the unmovable force squeezing the life out of me, because I need it all gone.

“I’m right here,” he hisses, holding me even tighter. “I’m right fucking here, and I’m not going anywhere, ever,” he chokes. “I’m here, and I’ll be whatever you need. Whatever it is, tell me,” he groans, burying his face in my hair and surrounding me with his strength and power.

“Just hold me,” I whisper against his chest. “Hold me and don’t ever let go.”

“I can do that,” he whispers back, squeezing me against him.

We stand like that in the moonlight outside his front door for… I’m not sure. It might be hours, or it might be just a few minutes. But in that blind strength and raw power, and in that immovable force, I find a peace I’ve been seeking for years.

Kenzo shakes his head. “I’m so fucking sorry, princess. Forgive me.”

I squeeze him tight, crying softly into his chest.

“There’s nothing to f?—”

“Yes,” he growls, pulling back a little. He cups my chin in his hands, tilting my gaze up to his. “Yes, there is.”

I smile wryly, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand. “I forgive you.”

His face twists with pain. “Annika, what did he?—”

“It’s in the past.”