Page 96 of All Roads Lead to You

“Fuck…”

“Is it bad for me to say part of me is happy she didn’t suffer from prolonged cancer? It’s bad, isn’t it?”

“It’s not bad,” I blurted. “I’m so sorry for your loss, Hunter. It’s never bad to wish and hope our loved ones don’t suffer.”

“Thanks, Nick.”

“I’m going to fly out as soon as I can,” Logan said.

“No, you’re not.”

Logan abruptly stood and paced as much as the small phone cord would allow him, still naked. I sat there and watched him, feeling helpless.

“The hell I’m not.”

He growled over the phone, a sound I knew all too well when Logan was beyond frustrated.

“No, I’m going.”

There was more talking from Hunter, but while I couldn’t hear it, I got the gist. He wanted us to continue with the trip.

“Dammit, Hunter! I need to be there.”

Back and forth he went until he deflated and sat back on the bed. “Fine, but I’m here to say I don’t like this one bit. I’m only doing this for you.” There was a pause, and he nodded. “Okay. Tell your family I love them and that I’m sorry. Once you have funeral arrangements ready, I’ll fly out.”

I leaned back into Logan to hear.

“Thanks, Logan. Trust me, there’s nothing you need to do here, and I need you to finish this trip now more than ever. Both our moms would insist on it. Okay, I got to run. Bye.”

“Bye.”

He slammed the receiver down and fell back into the bed. I lay next to him, and he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, bringing me closer.

His sigh was long and deep. “We’re still on for the trip.”

“I figured. Are you okay with that?”

“Hunter isn’t giving me a choice. Once we’ve reached California in six days, I’ll fly back home for the funeral.”

“Uh, if you think you’re going without me, you’re very much mistaken.”

“No, you don’t need to go. You have tennis to think about. Once you get to school, you’re going to be training hard.”

“Nope, I’m going to be there for you, and you can’t change my mind.”

Logan pulled me up higher against him and kissed my head. “Thank you. I love you.”

He said those words so freely now. His confidence grew more and more each day, and I was there to watch it all unfold. It was amazing.

I also itched to say those words. My feelings were also growing exponentially. Maybe too quickly. Once I was inside him, I was a goner. I was done for. Logan sucked me in, and I never wanted to go back to how things were. But I didn’t feel right saying them, either. I wanted to give him one hundred percent of myself before I did, and definitely not while he grieved.

Those feelings were coming. I knew them all too well, except they were so much stronger than how I felt for Lauren, and one of many reasons why being with Logan didn’t scare me.

Day 15

The next day, Logan and I agreed to drive toward Arizona. He said he was desperate for a change of scenery.

We quickly talked to our parents and then packed up the car. I drove so Logan could sleep some more. He needed it.

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