Page 42 of All Roads Lead to You

As he walked off with his hand at the small of her back, a sense of jealousy coursed through me. It was stupid, since he wasn’t mine and never would be. I shut down those unwanted feelings because he had every right to dance with a girl and have fun, and I didn’t want to dwell on the impossible.

I was also exhausted from being pissed off all the time. While admitting my truth to Nick had been mortifying, it’d also been freeing, like this weight on my shoulders had been slowly crushing me until I admitted to him who I was. Once it slipped off, I stood a little taller. Perhaps I needed to remember that the next time I walked into a gay bar.

Despite the jealousy that refused to leave me, I smiled, watching Nick try to dance, tripping as she led the dance, making her giggle. That was fucking cool, actually. He was confident enough in himself that he could be led by a girl when every other woman in the bar was being led by a man.

When someone sat next to me at the bar, I turned to find one of the girl’s friends. If I’d been straight, I would’ve found her attractive with her blonde bob, purple mini-skirt, white T-shirt, jean jacket, and large gold hoop earrings.

Shit. Here we go.

“Hey, I’m Rachel,” she said with a strong southern twang.

“Hey, I’m Logan.”

I sipped my beer, suddenly needing something stronger.

“So, are y'all from here? I’m from Knoxville, attendin’ the university there.”

“I grew up near Washington, DC.”

“Oh, how excitin’. I hadn’t been there before. I’d love to see the President.”

I’d never been one for conversation with people I didn’t know. I wasn’t sure if it was because I was that introverted or being gay and hiding myself for so long made me that closed off.

I lit a smoke and ordered a Jack and Coke, but didn’t offer to buy her anything, not wanting to hint that I was interested.

“So, ah, do you wanna dance?” she finally asked, twirling a strand of hair.

“I… don’t dance. Sorry.”

She nodded, trying not to look disappointed. I felt bad, but I wouldn’t change my mind.

“Well… okay then. See ya, Logan.”

“See ya, Rachel.”

I didn’t watch her walk away with my eyes completely peeled on Nick as he danced and laughed.

Chapter 13

Logan

It was almost three in the morning when Nick and I stumbled into our motel room, holding each other up and laughing like a couple of lunatics.

“Shhh, people are sleeping,” Nick said way too loud.

I snorted a laugh. “You shush. You’re the one yelling.”

We’d clearly had too much to drink, but it had been fucking fun to unwind, especially after I had enough liquor in me to let go of my jealousy for the rest of the night and ended up talking to the women who’d been friends with the girl Nick had danced with. Once I told them I had a girlfriend waiting for me in California, they stopped hitting on me.

I shut the door behind us, and Nick stumbled his way into the bathroom to piss and brush his teeth. When he came out, it was my turn. After washing my hands and brushing my teeth, I found Nick sprawled out, face down, on the queen-sized bed with the most hideous bedspread I’d ever seen in yellow and brown flowers. But what did that matter when he was only wearing his white briefs?

He was so relaxed and beautiful, but as much as I wanted to share the bed, I needed to sleep on the floor. If I slept next to him with him wearing virtually nothing, I’d probably end up wrapped around him as I had the other day in the tent. After that morning, I pushed my sleeping bag farther away from him. Well, as far as I could go in that tiny tent.

I grabbed an extra pillow, opened the closet to grab the spare blanket, and dropped them on the floor. The matted yellow shag carpeting was questionable in cleanliness, but I’d just shower again in the morning.

I yanked off my T-shirt and jeans, tossing them on top of my closed suitcase.

“What are you doing?” Nick asked, rolling onto his back, spread-eagle.

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