Page 37 of All Roads Lead to You

He pulled away, leaving me gasping before he shoved me back and glared. “See, now you can hate me as much as I hate you.”

While the words fucking stung, I didn’t believe him for a second. He was fighting something, and I started to doubt it was me.

“Why would I hate you?”

His jaw dropped to the ground. “What the fuck? I kissed you.”

I scoffed. “You call that a kiss? You literally just hit my mouth with yours.”

He growled at himself. “It wasn’t supposed to work out like this, dammit.”

“Oh, for the love of god, can you please explain to me what the fuck is going on? You’re being mental!”

Logan’s brows furrowed, and he frowned, shaking his head and rubbing his neck, looking thoroughly confused. “You… don’t know?”

I tossed my hands in the air. “Know what, dammit?” Maybe I was being dense, but the puzzle pieces simply weren’t connecting. I was too agitated and confused to figure this shit out.

Logan’s body deflated like a balloon, and he sank to the ground with a frustrated sigh. Then he bent over, placing his head between his knees, and heaved quiet sobs.

God, I really wasn’t equipped for this. Our parents were cool, but they raised us to suck it up or shake it off most of the time. For as long as I’d known him, I’d never seen Logan cry.

I sat down next to him and patted his back awkwardly. At least he didn’t flinch away this time.

“I’m… gay.” His voice sounded raw, raspy, and full of pain.

Do you know that moment when you’re working on a puzzle, and you can’t quite visualize what the image is yet, then after adding a few more pieces, it all becomes clear? That was my moment. The past several years just snapped into place between Logan isolating himself, working out all the time, playing football even though he didn’t seem to enjoy it all that much, and barely acknowledging girls. Hell, he’d been completely disinterested in those girls at the amusement park yesterday. Then there was his anger. Fuck, no wonder he was pissed all the time. I could damn well imagine how lonely his life could be, hiding your true self like that.

And in snapped the last puzzle piece. Logan’s fear of being alone for the rest of his life. It wasn’t legal for gay men to marry, right?

I didn’t know shit about being gay, not one bit. I’d never met anyone gay before, or openly anyway, or what the laws were. It hadn’t even been a blip on my radar until now. Sure, there’d been shit on the news, but I never really paid all that much attention to it.

“You’re gay?” It was a stupid-ass question since Logan had told me he was, but I was still processing.

“No, shit. You said it. I barely dated. How could you not tell I was fucking gay? I thought with all your questioning that you’d figured it out.”

“Like, I don’t know. I just thought you couldn’t find anyone and were alone because you’re such an asshole.”

He snorted a half-laugh and half-sob between his thighs, refusing to look at me. “That’s a fair assessment.”

I smiled and shook my head. “Why did you assume I would hate you?”

He shrugged. “Fear.”

“Honestly, dude, I know shit about being gay and have no opinions on it whatsoever. We live in a tiny town surrounded by a big city, but I got nothing. I don’t hate you if that’s what you’re worried about… or is that what you want? It’s hard to tell.”

He looked up and wiped his face. “You don’t?”

“Nope. You’re officially the first gay person I’ve met.”

“Yay, me,” he said dryly.

I chuckled, but I was relieved that we cleared the air about some things. “So, I’m going out on a limb here, judging by your earlier over-the-top reaction to my questions, that this isn’t a… choice.”

He shook his head. “No, I’ve known since I was a kid. I definitely wouldn’t have picked this life at that age. Hell, I knew nothing about sex at all or even gave a shit about dating anyone.”

“I see. And explain to me why you ‘kissed me,’” I air-quoted with my fingers.

Logan scowled, his eyes still leaking. “What the fuck are the air quotes for?”

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