Page 46 of Pippin & Nacho

“It’s all okay, baby.”

Nate and I had spent the rest of the day yesterday on our phones looking up anal sex. Sure, I’ve seen guys do it whenever I snuck in some porn, but I’ve never actually researched it, doubting I’d ever have sex. Because we wanted to do it right, we blushed through online instructions.

Once we were sure we had some clue as to what we were doing, we headed to the drugstore to buy lube and an enema bulb, which was even more embarrassing. While I probably didn’t need it, I was way too self-conscious about being clean enough and didn’t want to be distracted by my worries.

Nate and I both agreed we wouldn’t bother with condoms, since this was a first for us.

As I stared into the foggy mirror from the shower, my mind filled with doubts and insecurity. I drew a heart into the condensation on the mirror and wrote ‘NL + SM’ in the center like a middle schooler.

My stomach suddenly rumbled, and I rubbed it. Did I eat today? Then I remembered I chose not to. Maybe I could have a banana at least. Did we have bananas? I could ask Nate to buy some if we didn’t. But I wouldn’t get to eat one, regardless. Maybe I could have something else that’s small.

Nate knocked on the bathroom door, startling me. “How are you doing, baby?”

Baby.

I smiled at that. Fuck, it was as if he had this way of knowing when I needed him, or he had perfect timing.

Shit, what if he left me over this? If I failed and he grew bored, he wouldn’t stick around. Who wanted to be with someone so bad at sex? I couldn’t go on without my beautiful Polaris.

“Sam, answer me.”

Before I could second guess myself again, I opened the door. I was dried off but still naked from my shower.

His creamless-coffee eyes pinged straight to my cock, and he licked his full, kissable lips. “God, Sam… You look so fucking hot.” To prove how turned on he was, and without taking his eyes off my dick, he cupped himself as he started to tent in his sweats. And just like that, my cock grew hard at his reaction.

Nate eyed me and bit his bottom lip before he reached for my hand and tugged me out of the bathroom and toward his bedroom.

My heart raced often, though now it was filled with not only uncertainty, but excitement. The unknown thrilled and terrified me at the same time. Why was sex such a big deal? Everyone did it for the most part, right? It couldn’t be that hard, right? Yet my hands grew clammy and trembled in his strong, confident ones.

Once we reached his bedroom, Nate took my face in his warm hands and pulled me down for a kiss. “You can be inside me if you want instead. You can back out. Anything, Sam.”

I shook my head and gripped his narrow shoulders. “No. I want this.”

Nate stepped back, grabbed the hem of his worn T-shirt, and pulled it over his head, tossing it to the floor. His long, slender fingers slipped into the waistband of his sweatpants and pulled them off. He stripped away layers, exposing his smooth, tanned skin, virtually hairless, except for a smattering of hair forming his happy trail, which grew thicker as it got closer to his hard cock. He was free-balling it, making my heart flip around in my chest. Why did that turn me on so much?

“While I’m nervous, I still feel comfortable around you,” he said, stepping close enough to me so that our dicks touched. I pulsed with need as I nuzzled my face into his throat, and my hands grabbed the meaty flesh of his ass.

“Same.”

Nate took my hand in his and pulled me to the bed. I sat down and looked at him for guidance. He knew as much as I did, but I needed his confidence at that moment.

When he grabbed my face in the palms of his hands, they stuck to my skin, sweaty like mine. That alone eased my tension, knowing he was just as nervous as me. Saying it was one thing. Knowing it was quite another.

His hands trembled, but they were strong, controlling, and confident. They always knew what to do. His beautiful hands would soon own me.

Our kiss grew deeper as he eased me onto my back, taking ownership of our kiss. Each time my mind wandered from my insecurities, Nate would pull me back again like the ocean waves. I retreated, and he tugged me back to shore each time. We were fluid, working in opposite directions, yet together. For some strange reason, we worked.

“On your stomach, Sam. We need to work you open.”

My stomach dipped as I slowly rolled over, growing uncertain and insecure again. It could be fucking frustrating, but I had no control over my emotions sometimes… most of the time.

A quick and gentle slap to my ass brought me instantly back to Nate. “Move, baby. I want to play with that ass of yours. I’ve waited long enough.”

I smiled and fell into the bed, at ease once more.

“Sorry. Was… that too much?” he asked with a tentative voice, making me giggle.

“No, I liked it. I enjoy you controlling me. You’re the star, and I’m the planet forced to orbit around you by your gravitational pull.”

---