Page 63 of Rivals

“Riley, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. You asked why I was doing this, it’s because I love you. Because I want more for you, because you’re a fucking amazing hockey player and you deserve to skate with these girls here. And because I don’t want to be away from you when I can picture in my head exactly how our life can be here. And you liked it too. When I paint that picture for you, you like it. One of us has to be the dreamer, babe. I’m not giving up on this dream for us.”

Riley’s back is to me, and I watch as the tension fades. I wrap my arms around her and pull her body against mine. “You’re amazing, Riley Conrad, and one day you’re going to know it just like I do. Now let’s go shopping. The mall is right across the road.”

Riley barely slept last night. I was hoping shopping for her interview would wear her out or at least make her excited, but nothing. She’s been a ball of nerves since. Even my fingers gliding across her neck, over her pulse, doesn’t relax her. Every time she turned or moved in bed last night I was aware, hyper focused on making sure she stayed in the room with me. I half expected her to run to the airport and fly back home. Not that I didn’t have contingency plans set up, but I preferred to not have to tie her up. And for this reason, I barely slept. All I can focus on is getting her to the interview. The weight of the future is pressing on my chest. All the things I want to say to her, to promise, are trapped inside me.

“How does this look?” she asks, stepping outside the bathroom. My eyes wander over her fitted navy blue pants, heels, and the gauzy silver blouse she’s wearing. Her hair is perfectly curled with only the basics of makeup on her face. She takes my breath away, and the reality of the day starts to set in.

I move off the bed and wrap my arms around her, hugging her body to mine before pulling back and cradling her head in my hands. Making sure she’s with me, my fingers once again brush over her pulse, beating wildly against her delicate skin.

“You look ready to kick ass.”

Riley laughs and swats my stomach with her free hand. “I’m nervous.”

I press my lips to hers and breathe in her fresh, strawberry scent. “You’re a badass, Riley Conrad. You will blow them away.” She hums in agreement and it brings a ghost of a smile to my lips.

“This is a small point in our future, Riles. After this we graduate, we enjoy our years here, make friends, enjoy our alone time, play hockey, and when it’s over, we move on to the next big adventure. It starts here today, but we never end. After college there’s the draft, moving, our wedding, babies. We’re going to take the world by storm.”

Riley

“Can I get you anything to drink, sweetie?” the secretary to the dean asks, while I sit in the office, waiting. I glance up from my hands that are balled on my thighs and look at her. Her eyes are filled with concern. I probably look how I feel, which is that I’m going to puke all over this eggplant purple carpet.

Somehow I manage to shake my head. “No, thank you.”

With a small smile she scuttles back to her desk and starts clicking away on her keyboard. Hopefully she’s telling her boss to hurry up and get this girl out of her office area before she passes out. I feel like I could go either way right now. My stomach is in knots, my heart is racing, and my mind is blank. The pressure to have facts to converse about soon has made my brain completely melt.

Leaning back in the chair, I try counting backward from one hundred and breathing in and out slowly. I can’t make it past ninety-six before Reign’s stupid voice pops into my head and he’s whispering to me all his plans for the future. Our future. A future I hadn’t put much thought into past graduation.

Before Reign stormed back into my life at the end of this summer, I didn’t have a plan. I just wanted to play hockey for as long as I could and enjoy the time with my friends. I’ll admit, that’s probably not the smartest thing for an eighteen-year-old who soon would have choices to make. It just hadn’t mattered to me. A community college or technical school would have been fine.

I didn’t have a huge goal or dreams. Girls like me don’t always get those luxuries. I didn’t grow up rich, or have the world at my fingertips. I learned at a young age to save what I can and the rest would be needed to survive. Most of my childhood with my mom was spent surviving. She was a great mother, who did all she could, but the reality had been that we were poor. Until my dad came and by then, my mom couldn’t have any other dreams. She passed away so young. All our time together had been spent in our room at the shelter, playing games, or at the ice arena where she watched all my practices or games. We never talked about the future, colleges, my wedding or maybe me being a mom someday. She lived with me in the moment, and when I look back now, I realize it’s because she knew she didn’t have a future with me. She never pressed college on me because of the pressure her parents had put on her. Then when my dad came around, we also never discussed what my future would look like. Until Reign that is. My dad and Reign have been plotting and planning behind my back and I just don’t know how to feel about it.

I’m mad.

I’m happy.

I’m excited.

I’m scared.

I would miss my dad.

I don’t feel deserving.

Reign believes that I’m deserving. He reminds me all the time that I’m smart and dominate at my level in hockey. That I’m worth it. When he says these things, I want to believe him. I want to get caught up in his dream, and let it take me away. The thought also makes me nervous as hell. He was so detailed in his plans for us here in Michigan. His plan is to be drafted within three years to the NHL and then moving to wherever he’s playing. A wedding in the off season and babies soon after. The man said babies. We’re still young. He’s over the top. I hate that his plans give me butterflies and makes heat swirl low in my belly. It’s not fair to have to go up against Reign Thorn.

“Ms. Conrad,” A burly, older gentleman soon opens the door and I realize this is it. I’m looking at the dean of admissions and so far, he doesn’t look too impressed with me.

“Hi, sir.” I stand and hold out my hand. He eyes it before reaching forward and shaking my hand.

“You can call me Pete. All the kids do,” he adds with a warmer smile.

I follow him into his office and it is not what I expected. When I think college, deans, admissions, I tend to think older, stuffy, and lots of wood with drabby colors. This room is nothing like that.

It’s pristine, with white walls, but the school colors are splashed across it. Jerseys from different sports are displayed as well as game day pucks and balls. There is also a picture framed of the dean with the hockey team from five years ago when his son played. Suddenly, his interest in Reign and Reign’s family starts to make more sense. That pit in my stomach from earlier starts to grow back. I think my heart will shatter if Reign has bought this for me, just like my All Saints’ admission.

“So you’re visiting our great state for a few days, I’ve been told,” Pete says, his eyes assessing me.

I want to shrink in my seat but fight the urge. “Yes, sir. Just visiting for a few days. The campus is amazing. I’ve never been before.”

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