Page 89 of Fight for You

Quan and Boots drop to the ground beside me. They're both yelling, but I can't hear them. All I hear is my girl screaming as she realizes her entire world just ended.

"No!" she screams at the top of her lungs. "No! No! No!"

I push myself to my feet and stumble toward her, trying to get to her before she gets to Titan and her mom. She's running full out, practically flying through the grass toward them, but I can't let her see…I can't let her see.

"Let me go!" she screams when I wrap my arms around her. She fights me, kicking and scratching. Her little fists flail against me. Tears flow down her face in an endless flood. Every single one eviscerates me. She screams at me, pleading with me to let her go, to save her mom and brother, to help them…but I can't.

I can't.

I fucking can't.

They're beyond help now.

Thirty-two bullets.

That's how many it took to destroy my world. I know because I counted.

Seventeen million.

That's how much money it took to shatter hers. I know because I've still got the fucking bank statement in my hand.

Had I just said something about the money earlier, I could have saved Jana and Titan. Had I refused to keep his secret, I could have stopped this from ever happening. Had I stopped to think about that fucking SUV creeping down the street, I could have warned him.

I could have made a thousand different decisions that wouldn't have ended here—with January's entire world bleeding to death on a sidewalk while wrapping paper still flutters through the air like confetti.

Her entire family is gone, and it's my goddamn fault.

Christ, it's my fault.

She falls to the ground, and for the first time in my life, I don't have the strength to pick her up.

Chapter Seventeen

Cade

Present Day

She pushes against my chest and crawls from my lap, putting distance between us. Her stricken expression is like knives to my fucking soul. It hurts. Christ, it fucking hurts.

She's so pale, her face stained with tears. No one has ever talked about what happened with her. I don't think she's ever let anyone talk to her about it.

She still can't say out loud that her family was murdered in cold blood. They were gunned down in the street and died on a fucking sidewalk. That's how January turned eighteen—watching her family being carted away in body bags while the police asked her questions she didn't know how to answer. And she still can't say the words. Still can't face what happened.

She locked memories of that night away, refusing to revisit them. And I don’t fucking blame her.

I’d kill to forget it, to be able to close my eyes and not see him lying on that fucking sidewalk. To not see him take his last breath, or hear her scream as if her soul was being ripped from her body.

Fuck.

“Explain,” she demands, her voice shaking. “Right now, Cade.”

I don’t know where the fuck to start. How have I never thought about what I'd say if this day ever came? All those nights I spent alone, staring up at the ceiling, wishing like hell she was in my arms…I never let myself think about what I'd say. I never let myself think we'd ever see each other again. If I had let myself imagine it, I wouldn't have been able to stay away.

“He was dealing for Kaleo for two years, baby girl.”

"You knew he was dealing.”

I nod.

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