Page 74 of Love Me Not

“Let it go, Trey. I’m just annoyed.”

“Annoyed about the funding issues, or annoyed that a man stepped into your territory?”

If he wanted to push this, then fine. Let’s fight.

“I’m annoyed that good kids with interests that don’t involve sports get shorted because athletics get all the money and attention. I’m annoyed that culture and beauty and art are seen as less than when embracing them would make the world a better place. And I’m annoyed that I purposely didn’t tell you about the school budget issues because I was afraid you’d call their bluff and leave town for another job. That’s the part I hate the most. That where you go matters to me.”

“You knew there were funding issues?” he asked, voice low.

“Yes. Carole told me at the start of the year that drama might get cut. I didn’t know anyone else was in danger though.”

“Carole?”

“Principal Fabien. She’s been my sister’s best friend since we were kids so I call her Carole.”

We both fell silent and for the first time I realized the freezing wind blowing around us. The tip of my nose went numb, and I tucked my hands into the pockets of my coat to save my fingers from doing the same.

“So you were afraid I’d leave?” Trey finally said.

Feeling like a giant fool, I kept my eyes on a maple in the distance losing the last of its leaves. I understood exactly how it felt. “Yes.”

With one finger, he gently lifted my chin until our eyes met. “I’m glad that matters to you.”

He didn’t look smug or like a man who’d won a hard-fought victory. Just genuinely happy to hear that I cared about him. That I wanted him in my life, which felt insane and risky and scared the living crap out of me.

Time for more honesty, and he wasn’t going to like this part. “I also care about my club. If I lose that and you get everything you asked for, I’m not sure we can make this work.”

His brow furrowed. “Even though I have nothing to do with that decision?”

I sighed. “Yes.”

After another moment of silence, he opened my car door, dropped a kiss on my forehead, and said, “I understand.”

I couldn’t help but feel like this was a goodbye.

Keeping my eyes down, I climbed into the car and went through the motions of backing out and driving away. I might have been okay if I hadn’t looked in the rearview mirror to see Trey lingering next to the parking spot I’d just left. Watching me go. Making no move to walk to his truck.

I almost turned around and told him we would be fine no matter what happened, but that would be a lie. And lying wouldn’t be good for either one of us. This was for the best.

Chapter Eighteen

“You aren’t serious, though, right?” Megan asked, dark eyes full of concern.

“If Ryan had cut your reading program at the library, would you two be together today?” I asked, reminding her of what could have been.

Her face fell. “Probably not.”

There’d been no need for this little meeting, but I couldn’t bring myself to kick them out either. Over the course of our friendship, we’d instituted a sort of bat signal situation where if one of us needed immediate help, everyone else dropped what they were doing to be there, whether in person or through modern day technology.

For this one—which Becca had called on my behalf—they’d all shown up at my door in person with dessert in hand. Because having the one time I tried dating go down in flames this soon called for double chocolate fudge, fresh-baked brownies.

“But that would have been Ryan’s decision,” Josie pointed out. “You said yourself, this funding thing isn’t up to Trey.”

“No, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t resent him for it. Yinz know me. I’m a grudge holder.”

“It’s the Capricorn in you,” Donna said. “Won’t you feel bad if he doesn’t get what they promised him?”

Would I? I gave the question some thought and said, “No. I mean, it would suck that they lied to him, but if there’s no money, then there’s no money. The boys had a great season with the resources they have right now, and nothing says they couldn’t do it again. Most importantly, they’d have the opportunity to try. The rest of us who get cut literally have to stop entirely.”

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