Page 15 of Sinner's Vow

I push open the door for a dressing room, and there I find her.

She’s pacing back and forth, picking at the hem of her shirt. But the moment I walk in, she stops, her wide eyes going to mine.

And everything in me just kind of cracks.

I’ve been holding it in for so long, and now I’ve found out that I haven’t been holding it alone for the past month.

I cross the rest of the room in three strides, and I don’t hesitate as I wrap my arms around Kennedy and press my face into the crook of her neck.

“Noah?” she asks, concern and worry flooding her voice. “What’s wrong?”

“Thank you,” I breathe out, my lips brushing against the impossibly smooth surface of her skin.

“For what?” she says as she relaxes in my arms just a little bit, wrapping her own around me in return.

“For not thinking I’m an asshole who tried to fuck everything up,” I say.

I loosen my grip on her, just enough so she has the room to back up and look me in the eye. “Noah, you slept with someone, and she got pregnant. It happens. The fact that she went and got an abortion without telling you was her choice to make, yes, but it was a pretty shitty one.”

Hearing it come over her lips makes it hit harder. Emotions well in my eyes and my throat feels tight.

“Having that happen would mess up anyone,” Kennedy says softly. She brings a hand to my cheek, brushing her thumb over my lips. “You dealt with it the only way you knew how at the time. Maybe it wasn’t the right choice. But you no one can expect you to stay above the surface every day when you have these big waves crashing over you.”

“Except me taking those uppers didn’t just affect me,” I say in an emotional exhale. “I’ve been a disaster on this tour, Kennedy. I was out of my mind in New York. Kennedy, that was just two days before I met you. How…how can you even look at me?”

She shakes her head. “You’re dealing with a pretty unique situation of grief. And…if I shouldn’t be able to look at you, how can you look at me?”

I still at that. No. She isn’t going to feel unworthy. I shake my head. “You gave up your entire life to take care of your mother. You did what most couldn’t.”

Her eyes redden and she shakes her head. “But how could you ever look at me, knowing there are pictures of me out there…”

I reach a hand up and take hold of her chin, turning her face back to mine.

Something is happening.

Something is shifting.

Something is sliding back into place.

“I married you, Kennedy,” I say, my voice soft. “I haven’t been able to look anyone in the eye for six months. But you…you are the only person in this world I’ve trusted with the truth about getting Gina pregnant, and how she fucked my head up when she got rid of it without saying a word.”

Something flickers in Kennedy’s eyes. Her expression falters just a bit. And I don’t know what I just said, what I just messed up. But there’s something different there now.

“Noah!” Gabriel’s voice booms, just a second before he pushes the door open. His eyes hesitate on us, and I realize it’s because for the first time, he’s seeing me touching Kennedy outside of a stage. “We have a meet and greet. We’re late.”

My eyes flick back to Kennedy’s, and I want to ask what’s wrong. She’s trying to cover the hesitation back up but isn’t entirely successful.

Gabriel grabs me by the back of the shirt, and my giant of a best friend pulls, and I lose my grip on her.

We still need to talk.

But I feel so damn relieved.

Maybe I still can’t remember the entire night. But this is open between us. It’s on the table.

And we have time. There are still two months left on this tour.

So, I give her a wary smile as Gabriel pulls me out the door. “We’ll talk more after the show,” I say, just as he pulls me out of view.

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