Page 82 of The Only Goal

“I don’t know,” she murmurs, her face bunching. “I just don’t feel like I can tell Kai that, okay?” Snatching her pajamas bottoms off the floor, she wrestles herself into them, the fabric twisting in her haste and slowing her down. “It’s so complicated, you know?”

“It doesn’t have to be,” I mutter, my insides writhing. I’m hating every second of this conversation. “Just tell Kai that you’re with me now and that you guys can live here.”

“How?” She flings her arms wide. “This place is about to become a bed-and-breakfast.”

“So?”

“I doubt the owners are gonna want me raising a child around their guests.”

“They won’t mind.”

“Really? Have you checked? I’m sure Vanessa would have something to say about it.” She gives me a pointed look, and all I can do is dart my eyes away from her. “And what about Kai? He gets nervous around strangers. This environment will unsettle him.”

“So, we move someplace else.”

“We’re moving in together now?” She blinks at me in surprise.

I match her expression with a confused frown. What is she not getting here? Why is she acting like this?

Unless…

Oh fuck.

I clench my jaw and stare at the rumpled duvet cover, willing my heart not to die on the spot.

She doesn’t love me.

This is just a fling for her. She’s not serious about wanting to set up a life with me. I’m just… I don’t know what the fuck I am.

But I’m definitely not Kai’s father. And I’m obviously not Tammy’s boyfriend either.

Sex must mean something different to her.

I thought we were making love, but she’s not on the same page as me.

So, I do the only thing I can.

I go quiet.

CHAPTER 40

TAMMY

The expression on Baxter’s face is glacial. I can feel him retreating into himself, and part of me wants to fight for him to come back, but I’m too exhausted to try.

I don’t know how we can go from epic sex to a disagreement, but it’s happening.

I can’t even remember exactly what I said to make him shut down like this.

Maybe I’m just kind of reeling that he’s wanting to move in with me—form some kind of family unit. I wasn’t expecting that. I get that I’m his high school crush. I get that he’s only ever wanted me. And that is so freaking sweet and endearing, but we’ve barely spoken for five years, and now he’s wanting to set up a life with me?

I’m not the girl I was from high school.

He doesn’t know what he’s proposing. Taking on a kid who’s not even his? Taking on what could be a brutal custody battle? If Hudson gets even a whiff of Baxter, he’ll no doubt use it against me, making this whole process a million times harder.

And even if we do survive all of that, how is Baxter going to support me and Kai? I don’t even know if he gets paid to work here. And I’m guessing he makes minimal money as a hockey coach. Kai and I can’t live off that.

And even if I do get a job and we somehow scrape together enough to live off, what if things go wrong? What if Baxter decides stepfatherhood isn’t for him, and then Kai has to go through losing another parent all over again?

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