Page 18 of The Only Goal

We’re safe, and I’m not telling you where we are, because I’m not ready to see you right now. I asked for space, Hudson. You owe me that. Please, stop texting me!

You’re my wife! Of course I’m going to text you and make sure you’re okay. Especially when you won’t answer your fucking phone!

I’m not answering because I don’t want to talk to you right now. And I might be your wife, but you definitely weren’t acting like my husband two days ago!

I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry! If you’ll just pick up the phone, I can actually say it to you. You can’t just run away. We need to fix this.

I scowl at the screen before dropping the phone and listening to it buzz while Hudson sends through another chain of texts. He won’t let this go until he knows where I am. But screw him. I’m not saying anything right now. That’s why I turned off my location tracker. I don’t want him hunting me down and showing up here. Not until I figure out… what? I don’t know what I need to figure out; I just know I can’t face him yet. It’s too painful.

My phone buzzes again, and I let out a little screech, snatching it off the bed and turning the thing off. Not just silent but freaking off! Slamming it back down on the soft duvet, I pinch the bridge of my nose and sniff.

“Mommy?” Kai’s voice is soft and full of worry.

Shit. I’d forgotten he was sitting right there. What is wrong with me?

Forcing a smile, I look across the room at him. Fezzik is curled up by his side, his chin resting on Kai’s little thighs. They look adorable together, and I should take a picture, but I don’t want to touch my phone right now. “What’s up, sweetie?”

“Are you okay?”

“Uh-huh.” I nod, biting my lips together, knowing he can sense my lie.

His light brown eyes drink me in. He’s watching me in that quiet way of his. I love his cute face so much. His serious, thoughtful expression. My heart is bleeding with affection… and also pain. I never wanted him, but as soon as I held him in my arms, he was mine, and I loved him with a fierceness I never thought I was capable of feeling.

“Do you miss Daddy? Is that why you’re sad?”

The question stumps me for a second, and I work my jaw to the side as I try to answer him. Eventually, I settle for a deflect. “Do you miss Daddy?”

He shrugs, his lips turning down at the edges.

As much as I hate to do it, I pick up my phone and hold it out to him. “You can call him if you want.” It should be safe enough. Kai barely speaks anyway, and it’s not like he’ll tell Hudson where we are. I do run the risk of him telling Hudson about the dog and possibly talking about a scary man with a beard, but I’ll be right here to monitor the call.

As much as I don’t want it to happen, I can’t deny Kai access to his father… even if his daddy is a shithead.

Guilt pinches me.

I feel bad for calling my husband that, but… dammit, he is!

He cheated on me!

The thought is like a punch to the stomach, and I feel the pain hit me with a force so strong, I nearly buckle.

I’ve been a good wife. Loyal. Supportive.

And he’s screwing blondes with big boobs in my freaking shower!

It hurts. This pain is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It makes me want to crumple to the ground and weep… or maybe scream. I don’t know. I hate this onslaught of black-and-blue emotion so much.

“Um…” Kai bites his lip, staring at my phone like it’s a snake.

I can’t help a soft grin. “Still scared to talk on the phone, huh?”

He wrinkles his nose, and all I can do is laugh at his cute expression. “Well, if you change your mind, you just have to ask, okay?” I swallow the rock in my throat and grit out, “I’m sure Daddy would love to hear from you.”

He glances at the phone, then back at Fezzik, and then his eyes track to the stack of books Rachel left for him. He doesn’t reach for one, and my insides spasm. Does he want to keep talking? Is he going to ask me why I left or what an affair is?

Shit. I shouldn’t have spoken so freely around him.

He opens his little mouth, but before any words can pop out, I jump off the bed.

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