Page 20 of Upon an April Night

“What happened? Why didn’t you end up with Roy?”

Tears slipped down her cheeks, and she let go and patted his hand, then waved off his question. “That’s all ancient history. My point is we all make mistakes. Sometimes big ones. What’s most important is what we do after.”

Duncan nodded.

“And I have faith that you’ll seek God’s guidance for what to do next.”

If only she knew he hadn’t been talking to God about any of this.

“You are a good man, Duncan. I believe that.”

He only hoped he could live up to Nana’s faith in him.

Chapter 9

After Jamie’s announcement yesterday, Mom had been giving her the silent treatment. She hadn’t lectured or tried to change her mind, but the quiet way she walked through the house, preparing meals, cleaning, and watching television, spoke volumes.

As much as Jamie knew her mother wanted an adorable, sweet-smelling baby to love and play with, there were too many reasons why now was not the right time for her to be having a child. First being her business. She was busy most weekends photographing weddings and during the week editing the photos, often late into the night. Where would she find time to care for a child? And how would she afford to pay someone to watch the baby while she worked? Her business was doing well, but not well enough for that added expense, not to mention all the other expenses that go along with having and taking care of a baby.

Jamie sat on the front porch, watching the cars drive by, feeling confused and lost. Her phone buzzed from an incoming call.

Shannon.

For the first time, Jamie didn’t want to talk to her best friend. Shannon had made it very clear where she stood, and that she wouldn’t support abortion. But knowing Shannon couldn’t have children did give Jamie pause. She wished it hadn’t taken her pregnancy for her best friend to confide in her about her situation. It was a difficult and private matter, she understood that, but how heartbreaking that Shannon had gone through it all alone.

Jamie hadn’t seriously considered Shannon’s offer to adopt the baby, because it felt strange to her, having her and Duncan’s child raised by its aunt. How could she be around that baby and watch it grow up with someone else? And how could she go through the entire pregnancy only to give the baby away when it was over? The delivery scared her nearly as much as raising the baby herself. She wasn’t sure she could do it or even wanted to.

The buzzing of her phone stopped, followed by another buzz a few seconds later, signaling a voicemail. She was afraid to listen at first, but curiosity got the better of her.

“Jamie! You are not going to believe who just called me. Vern! The owner of the building. Our building! Apparently, the sale fell through with the other buyer, but someone else has stepped up to buy the building, and Vern said they want to offer us the space for our studio after all. Can you believe it? Call me when you get this. He says he’ll meet us there in an hour.”

A surge of happiness rushed through her. It had been such a disappointment when Vern had decided to sell the building rather than rent them the space for their new studio. Shannon had taken it hard, so her extreme enthusiasm over this turn of events was not surprising.

Jamie’s finger hovered over her phone. Part of her wanted to call immediately and share in the excitement, but she couldn’t. Besides, she wasn’t in Grand Rapids right now, anyway, so there was no way she could meet with Vern. She would let Shannon handle it. She trusted her to make good business decisions for both of them.

After thirty minutes had passed, her phone buzzed again. This time with a text from Shannon.

Please don’t do anything you’ll regret. Duncan has the right to know before you make any huge decisions. It’s his baby too. And I was serious. If neither of you wants it, I’ll raise it as my own.

Jamie stared at the text, realizing Shannon must’ve stopped by her apartment and found the note she’d left with the memory cards. Her heart ached and tears burned her eyes. This was exactly the reason she had left town. She couldn’t make this decision with Shannon around. She couldn’t think straight knowing how Shannon felt. Rather than writing her best friend back, she closed her phone and buried her face in her hands as the tears fell.

The front door creaked, and Jamie quickly wiped her face as her mother sat down in the wicker chair next to hers.

“Please talk to me, sweetie.”

Jamie sniffled.

“I’ve always been your sounding board for all the decisions you’ve made in your life. Why can’t I be that for you now?”

“I want you to, Mom.”

“Then tell me what you’re thinking. I promise I’ll only listen.”

Jamie told her everything. From her night with Duncan, her feelings for him, his sudden engagement, to Shannon’s offer to adopt. She let it all spill out as tears wet her cheeks.

Her mom quietly listened, taking it all in.

“I just don’t think I can be a mom right now. It’s not the right time.” Jamie brushed away another round of tears. “That’s why I came home. So you would tell me what to do.”

---