Page 37 of Troubles

The air stills as I wait, searching his face. I want him to say he’s staying. I do. I really do, but this is scary as shit. There’s no way I could ever ask him to stay, so feeling him out is the safest for my heart. With the rest of his family still in Dublin, he has no reason to stay.

“Erm. Maybe three months to start. Just to make sure the location works.” That tells me nothing. “Or maybe an Airbnb. That would make more sense since they’re already furnished.”

I pull back, dropping my hands to my lap, wiping sweaty palms on my shorts.

“So, just for an extended vacation, or…?”

“Lisbeth. Truly, I don’t have any furniture, it would be smart to move into something furnished.”

Our food arrives and we scroll through the site between bites. This is so far out of my comfort zone. Asking questions of someone, trusting them not to hurt me. And true to everything he has shown me, Aidan senses it, my nerves.

By the time we’re done, we have forty minutes to make it to the first appointment.

Aidan

We spend most of the day trekking around town looking at different flats. Nice ones with no furniture, crappy ones with too much furniture and the stink of cats that will last far longer than the building will be standing. And a few that would be just about perfect.

Lis points out the things she likes and doesn’t in each of them and I file that information away as quite important. I want her to like the place I get. I want her with me.

“I have a test to study for, again. It’s the last one before my final and then I have like three weeks off before clinical rotations start. Do you want to order food and come hang out with me? And watch me study?”

“Much as I would love to watch—or help you study,” God I love the blush that creeps up her neck at that, “I have some calls to return for work, for photography. And, I don’t want to distract you.” Her thoughts have gone straight to our first study session.

I park behind her car, really not wanting to let her go, but knowing I have to. Much as I would love to spend the evening with her, with nowhere to go and nothing to do but watch her work, I know I need to say no.

I press my lips tight together and step out of the car, rounding the front to open her door.

“So, you don’t want to come over?” She leans into me wrapping her arms around my waist and tilts her head up. Her wide eyes bouncing back and forth between mine.

“I want nothing more than to come over—and over, and over.” I push my smile as wide as I can while running my mind through all things I’d love to do with her—to her.

She smacks my chest, laughing while pushing away from me. I open the door to her car and tuck her inside. “I know this—school— takes priority right now. Your test is tomorrow?”

“Yeah, and my final Wednesday. But, then I have time. I can breathe for a bit—I can be all yours.” Her hand hovers above her eyes, blocking the few rays of sun as I angle my body to shield her. It’s the smile that squinches her eye almost closed.

“Can we do dinner after your final? Maybe make some plans for that all mine idea?” I’m already making plans and lists and more plans.

“Yup. That’ll give me something to look forward to. Is there an incentive for grades? A sliding scale, maybe, better rewards for better grades?” It takes nothing for her to wink since her eye is about shut already, but it’s adorable when she does it. She darts her gaze to the sky, mentally running through her schedule. “Wednesday?”

“That works. Study hard and I’ll check in with you.” I lean in her open window for the kiss that will have to get me through the longest stretch we’ve spent apart in weeks. Hands wrapped in her hair as she strains to get closer to me. It’s not near enough, but I let her go. And bound up to my flat to put my plans in motion.

23

Lis

Relief washes over me as I walk my final exam to the front of the classroom. I’m almost done. I made it through this set of classes and it starts to settle in just how close I am to graduating. Oh. My. God.

My drive home is full of windblown, wild hair and blaring music. This feeling, there’s not much better. I drop my bag under the table by the door and chuck my keys into the dish. I’m exhausted.

Gracyn promised to help me get ready for dinner tonight, but I can’t resist crawling into my bed for a little bit. I close my eyes and commit to this nap.

“Hey. You need to wake up, Lis.” Gracyn jolts me from a dead sleep. I sit up, throwing the covers off and rub the sleep from my eyes.

“What time is it?” My phone lights up with a couple missed calls and a voicemail.

“Yeah, I tried calling to let you know I’d be a little late, but you didn’t answer. Go, jump in the shower and hurry.” There’s no point in arguing or pointing out that there’s plenty of time. Gracyn has a look in mind, and I am at her mercy.

This thing with Aidan has grown, changed. He’s found his way into my heart as much as that scares me. This date tonight is different. It doesn’t just feel like a simple dinner out, it feels like more.