Page 5 of Knot Your Rebel

A bigger thought hit me as I flopped down onto the bed with a sigh. How many STDs has he gotten by now, and why wasn’t I more careful? I’d definitely need to get tested.

Over the next few months, his behavior completely changed, his mood always taking on a bitter flavor. He was acting out to try and get my attention. I barely made eye contact anymore.

I’d spend my days out of the house and away from the toxicity of the situation. I knew I needed to just move out, but I hadn’t had a job in years and wasn’t sure where I’d get the money. We only had one bank account, and he was the one who had access to it. Another stupid decision on my part. Another way to control me.

He started drinking, continued bringing home an assortment of women and fucking them right in front of me. Snide comments would leave his mouth with each thrust. “Why can’t you be more like them? Why can’t you be loose and free? Live a little.” He was toxic, everything that had once been beautiful was now scarred and shrouded in darkness; tar black as night coated it while demons whispered obscenities in my ears. Mentally, it was challenging to try and ignore him. Physically? I was just exhausted.

Have you ever felt so bitter about something that it literally tarnished everything pure and innocent around you? That’s what Brad had become to me.

When I was at home, I spent a good chunk of time in my room with headphones on so I didn’t have to hear the noises or the banging of the bed against the wall behind me. Disgust rose in my throat like a foul creature reaching out of the earth on a cold, dark, eerie night.

I remember my last night with him like it was yesterday.

“Where have you been?” He demanded to know as I walked through the door a little too late for his liking.

“Out.” He deserved nothing more.

“You’re still my fiancée. You’re still living under this roof, and if you think for one second that I won’t take everything from you, then you’ve got another thing coming, you little bitch.” He sneered, and the twisted decay of alcohol crawled off his lips. His hand reached out, and he tried to grab me as I attempted to walk past him.

He missed the first time, but the second time he tried it, I wasn’t so lucky. Fingernails dug into my skin, leaving behind tiny crescent shapes. From the pressure he was holding me with, I knew I’d have bruises on my arms. He flung me around and pulled me against his body, letting me feel the unmistakable erection within his pants. “I miss you, baby. Why ya gotta be such a goddamn bitch? Why ya gotta act like you’re better than me? That’s what this is, right? You think you’re better than me? That bitch of a best friend decided to run her mouth, and now she’s painted me as the goddamn asshole? What’d she say, huh? Do I need to make a trip to Nova’s house?” Hot breath fanned over my neck as I tried not to cringe.

He’d been angry before but had never laid hands on me. This was a new development. A lump formed in my chest. Surely, he wouldn’t do that. Go to her house. I didn’t think so, but one look down at his firm grip on my arm reminded me that he was apparently capable of anything at the moment.

“Let me go,” I said firmly, hoping that he didn’t hear the small shake in my voice. Fear radiated through my body, poisoning each cell as it spread like wildfire.

“No, you’re going to give me what I want or I’m going to take it.” His words were pure venom spat from his cheating mouth.

“What is it -?” Those were the only three words that came out as his hands went to the waist of my pants. He fumbled with the button on my jeans, hands shaking like a leaf. My voice trembled, and my teeth chattered as it slipped out. “What the fuck are you doing?” For the first time, I truly feared for myself.

“You’re going to fuck me willingly… or we’ll do this the hard way. What’s it going to be?”

I glared at him. “I’m not fucking you.”

“You’re going to be sorry you said that.” He tried fumbling with my jeans again, and I knew it was time for me to get out. I couldn’t, wouldn’t, let him do this to me. I’d been touched enough in that sick foster home to know I refused to be raped by my own goddamn fiancé too. I tried to shove him away, but his big hands gripped me tighter. A hand smacked against the side of my face, making a loud clap, and fire bloomed on the spot. It was followed by a punch that radiated through my eye socket and led to a bout of dizziness. “Stop moving.”

Shaking it off, my flight instinct kicked in. I couldn’t worry about my head right now. I had bigger problems.

“No.” My voice was no longer firm. It quivered. The struggle continued as I looked for my way out. The button on my pants finally popped open, and he smirked at me before attempting to shove his hand down my pants. Seeing an opportunity when he turned, I took it, grabbing his shoulders and kneeing him in the balls. He crouched over immediately as pain laced his breaths.

“What the fuck?”

He reached out and tried to grab me, but this time, I backed away in time. I needed to get my shit and get out, pronto. Running the short distance to my spare bedroom, I slammed the door and locked it, praying that it would give me enough time to grab some things. I rested against the door for a brief second, trying to get my breathing under control. What the hell?

My heart raced as I frantically tried to remember what I would need to take with me. He was yelling my name now, the sound getting louder with each step he took in my direction. “Rebel.” He was pissed. “Rebel.” I jumped when a heavy thud landed against the door.

Rushing to the closet, I found the closest bag and unzipped it, hands shaking like leaves in the wind.

“Open this fucking door, Rebel, or I swear to God, you will be begging me to forgive you by the time I’m done breaking you down.” The doorknob rattled, and he roared. “Stupid, cunt omega. Your father said you were temperamental. Speaking of… Did you know he paid me handsomely to make sure you were okay after that unfortunate accident of his? Pity they both died that night, right?” My arms stopped moving, and all I could feel was my heart pounding in my chest like a bass drum, my breaths coming faster and faster. What was he talking about?

I shook my head, blood pumping furiously through my veins, leaving me a little light-headed. “No, he didn’t,” I said out loud, not realizing it.

“Yes, he did, sweetheart. You ever wonder how I knew where you were going to be that night? Daddy Dearest had a tracker on you. Well, I guess, technically, I had a tracker on you. He gave it to me right before that car wrapped around the tree. Tsk, tsk, tsk, such a shame.”

Get it together, Rebel. You need to get the hell out of this house.

The sound of glass shattering outside my door broke me out of the haze. I started moving again, opening drawers and just shoving clothes into the bag I’d grabbed. I opened the hidden compartment in the bottom of my dresser and pulled out the extra set of car keys I’d kept for emergencies. Mine were currently resting on the hook in the hall by the door. There was no pomp and circumstance to the way I moved. I could come back for stuff later. I’d need a change of clothes or two, and that was all. Shoving a few more things in my bag, I assessed my room once more. “Oh, Rebel…. Come out, come out. We weren’t done having a little discussion. I’m waiting.”

I wasn’t going to respond. It would just bait him. Looking around the room, I thought about my options. Go back out there and face an alcohol-infused beta with anger issues or… my eyes found the tiny window in the back of the room. Luckily, it was on the first floor of the house, so it wouldn’t be that far to jump. Not seeing any other way to get out of here without more damage to myself, I headed towards the window.

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