Page 120 of Vengeful Guard

“You are both. You’re a little girl to your da and your family and a grown woman inside.”

Kael’s staring at my mouth, and it’s like the whole world has fallen away. It’s just him and me and this gym and my aching knuckles.

“Lara and Bree think I have feelings for you.” I don’t know why I needed to say it, but I look into his eyes as I do.

He freezes, his face going blank. “And do you?”

I do. So many, so confusing. So overwhelming.

I stare at him, his mouth, his nose, his blue eyes. I want him. All of him. His taste, his smell, his grumpiness, his tenderness. The good, the bad, the ugly. I want to live in him, I want him to live in me. I want to be his safe harbor, his haven, and I need him to be mine.

But this is me, Paige Burke, the baby of the family, the burden, the liability. And that is Kael Sullivan, the god of unattachment. I don’t need to humiliate myself even further, do I? I already gave myself to him, begged him to take my virginity, I won’t beg for his affection too.

“I’m not done sparring.” I stand up, and Kael groans.

“You’ve been beating my ass for half an hour now, Paige. My bollocks ache.”

I giggle even through my tears. “I’m sorry. Promise no more below the belt.”

“You didn’t answer the question.”

“And I’m not going to.” I throw out my leg, kicking him in the thigh.

He grunts but doesn’t move backward, grabbing me around the waist and chucking me to the mat.

Finally, he’s not holding back.

This is what I want. I want him to fight me like he would a man. I need to learn how to be as good as Murphy’s men, so that I can protect myself. So that maybe I can be part of the retaliation.

I know that Declan and Gray will never allow me, but a girl can dream, right?

I stand up quickly, bouncing on my feet, and I go at him again, tackling him around the waist this time with my upper body.

He stumbles backward but doesn’t go down, so I grab onto his thigh, bending his knee in a move he showed me that really hurts.

Kael yelps but hops backward on one leg to the wall, managing to get me off him by forcing me to step back.

I stumble and fall on my butt, and Kael looks down at me, smirking.

“You’re not there yet, princess. You can’t beat me.”

“Like hell I can’t,” I growl, and I attack him again, this time, punching him in the stomach.

Kael rocks backward on his heels.

I push his chest until he falls over, and then I straddle his lap, punching him in the ribs.

He grunts again and grabs one of my fists in his own to stop me, but I wiggle out of his grasp and keep hitting him.

He’s letting me win, and it’s driving me crazy as I look down at his face. All he’s doing is deflecting, not attacking, and I want him to fight me. I want him to flip me over, show me all his strength.

“Come on, Kael, show me what you’ve got.”

“You don’t want that, princess.”

I punch him again. “I do. I need you to not hold back. I need you to… I need you…” I can’t get the right words out, can’t get any more words out.

I hit him again and again.

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