Page 51 of Selfish Desires

“We’ll see.” Vincent shrugged as if he didn’t care either way. Lately, that had been his attitude, and his indifference was unnerving, like I was being set up for something unknown.

And I hated it.

The tension was palpable now, cutting through the homey aroma of marinara sauce and the comfortable silence that usually accompanied our dinners.

“Is there something bothering you, Vincent?” I finally asked, my voice cutting through the quiet of our dining room.

Vincent flinched slightly as though he had been lost in thought. Surprise flickered across his features, and he looked at me before composing himself quickly.

“No, not at all,” he replied quickly. Way too quickly for my tastes. His lips quirked up into a smile that didn’t reach his bottomless blue eyes.

I rolled another forkful of spaghetti into my mouth before swallowing it. Staring at him now, with so many possible things hidden behind those spectacles and inside his heart, it was hard not to worry. Finally, unable to stomach another bite, I discarded my fork with a heavy clank against the white porcelain plate.

“Seriously, Vincent. What’s going on?”

Vincent shifted uncomfortably in his chair, dark eyes avoiding mine as he swirled his wine glass idly, watching the deep red liquid spin. “You really want to know?”

Was he fucking kidding right now? “Um, yes.”

He placed the wine glass down, frowning, and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “This has been weighing on me lately. It’s not a bad thing, though.” Vincent’s eyes dropped to his half-eaten plate. “At least, I don’t think.” He took a deep breath, still avoiding my gaze. His hands were wrung together tightly, knuckles white. A small sigh escaped from his lips, and he finally looked up, his dark eyes locking onto mine. A sense of seriousness washed over his features as he started to speak. “It’s funny because I don’t want to scare or overwhelm you. But I feel like I can’t wait anymore.”

“Oh my God, Vincent. You are driving me insane. I don’t even know what you’re saying.” I massaged my temples, placing both elbows on the table. “You need to just come clean before I lose my mind.” I exhaled. “Are you going to ask me to move somewhere with you? Do you not like Newport anymore? Do you want to leave?”

A fleeting smile skipped across Vincent’s sharp features before he shook it off. “Leave you? N-no, Wendy. It’s just the opposite. Hold on.” He held up a finger, standing from the table. “I’ll be right back.” And then he left the room.

I hated that phrase. I’ll be right back. I knew it shouldn’t affect me the way it did, but I realized some things were harder to shake. And this was one of them.

Vincent returned a minute later, holding a small, navy velvet box. My heart shot to my throat as I realized what was happening. He didn’t want to leave me.

“Wendy,” he started, sitting down. He took my hands into his; they were surprisingly cold, and I instinctively tightened my grasp around them, trying to warm them up. “I can’t imagine my life without you.”

I looked at him—truly looked at him. His eyes held a vulnerability that wasn’t there when we had first met all those years ago. But there he was, the man I loved despite everything between us. My heart pounded loudly, threatening to chatter the bones encasing it, and my hands shook.

“In the time we’ve been apart,” Vincent continued, pulling me out of my thoughts, “I realized how much I need you…how much I love you.” His voice held an earnestness that touched my core. “This is me committing to you. Showing you that you are the one I need to spend the rest of my life with.”

He opened the box, revealing a stunning pink diamond ring, glowing in the dimmed light and nestled within its velvet bed. My breath caught at the sight of it. It was beautiful, but as right as this moment should have felt, something felt…off. I deserved to be loved, cherished, and treated like a queen. And I knew my forever was meant to be with Vincent, except the way we reached this point almost felt tainted. If I accepted this proposal, something deep within me told me I needed some sort of punishment. All the bad that had happened to me, only to lead me to this point, exuded a slight corniness. I had somehow become that girl living through her second-chance romance, and I kept asking if we would last. Or would there be a new event to throw us off course?

I took a deep breath, pushing aside my swirling doubts. He was here, offering me a love I knew I wouldn't find anywhere else.

“I've waited so long for this moment, Wendy.” His fingers traced the back of my hand where it lay sandwiched between his. “Believe in me because I know what you’re thinking.” His voice almost broke under the weight of his emotions. “My past will always be a part of me, but it does not define who I am now. Who I am...is yours.”

I swallowed hard at his words. It was so powerful, so raw and honest that, for a moment, I forgot how to breathe.

“Do you trust me?”

I could tell that this question was more for him than for me. He needed reassurance just as much as I did.

“Yes,” I answered immediately without giving it another thought. The word felt right coming from my lips because, despite everything we had been through, I knew I did trust him deep down. I trusted him enough to know what I wanted to do.

He removed the ring from the velvet box and held it inches from my eyes. The pink diamond shimmered under the lights, mirroring the hope and anticipation in his eyes. “Wendy,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Will you marry me?”

I gazed into his wide eyes, seeing a future in them. A future where we made mistakes and fought but also one where we loved and forgave each other. It was a future I wanted. “Yes, Vincent.” My voice quivered. “Yes, I will marry you.”

His face broke into a wide, jubilant smile as he slipped the ring onto my finger. The joy in his eyes was immeasurable, and it was like all our troubles had melted away. He pulled me into his arms, holding me as if he never wanted to let go. And I didn’t want to let go ever again. The warmth from Vincent’s body seeped through my skin, heating my heart right down to the core of my soul. But, there was something more I wanted to solidify this moment, and I could almost guarantee Vincent did not see this coming.

“I’m so happy,” he murmured against my hair. Vincent pulled away, holding me at arm's length, kneeling before me. “Should we finish our cold dinner?”

“I have a better idea.” I half laughed as involuntary goosebumps erupted along my skin. Heat flooded my face as I geared up to make one final request for the evening. “I’ve been thinking about what we haven’t done in the bedroom.”

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