Page 64 of Soulbound Shadows: Part 2

When we got back to the safe house, Damien split off to stash the wand somewhere safe, and I went up to my room. When I got up the stairs, I stopped short. The little sitting area on the landing was occupied.

Gabriel, pale-faced and nervous, stood at the window.

“Evangeline,” he breathed, wide-eyed. “I was…” He cleared his throat. “I was hoping we could talk.”

Nervousness, eagerness, and anger all bubbled up inside me. I fought to keep control of my face. I shrugged and angled my head down the hall, and he fell into step behind me. He stayed silent until I got to my room—the room that, until recently, we had been sharing. The bed still smelled like him.

Gabriel looked so miserable and twitchy, I had to turn away from him or I’d do something stupid like forgive him before he even apologized. I toed off my boots and shrugged out of my jacket with my back to him.

“Well? You’re the one who wanted to talk,” I said, hoping it came off sounding breezy and confident.

“Yes,” Gabriel said, his voice oddly muffled. When I turned around, he was kneeling on the floor, arms stretched out ahead of him, and forehead nearly touching the carpet. My first thought was that it was a weird time to do the child pose, and then I realized that he was literally prostrating himself in front of me.

A surge of affection joined in the tangle of emotions knotting up my insides. What a fucking weird nerd. I liked him so much.

“I’m very sorry,” Gabriel said into the carpet. “I shouldn’t have tried to make a choice like that for you. I hope you can find it within your heart to forgive me, but I understand if you can’t.”

I knelt on the floor in front of him and put a hand on his shoulder. He twitched.

“You know better than anyone how much I’ve been dealing with,” he babbled. “But you also know better than anyone that isn’t an excuse. It was unfair. I was being unfair and cruel, even though that was the farthest thing from what I intended. I was afraid, and I…”

“Gabriel,” I murmured. “Look at me.”

He let out a shuddering breath. I ran my hand along his shoulder and cupped the back of his neck. Gabriel rose up into the touch like an eager cat. He lifted out of his prostrating and raised his head, but he didn’t meet my eyes. I touched the sharp line of his jaw and turned him to face me.

“You were being really dumb,” I said gently, which startled a laugh out of him. I smiled. “And it really fucking sucks that you used our relationship as a stick to beat yourself with.”

“I know,” he said immediately. “I know, I shouldn’t have. You deserve?—”

I put a finger to his lips. “My turn to talk. I know you didn’t do it because of me, but that also sucks, you know? Feeling like I wasn’t even part of the consideration was shitty. But I know what we’re dealing with isn’t normal. It’s not the stuff we’ll deal with every day. I want to make this work, and I think we can if we try. I really like being with you, Gabriel. I like who I am around you. I…” I took a deep breath. Gabriel watched me with desperate, liquid eyes. My stomach swooped and dipped as if I were standing at the edge of a cliff. “I love you,” I said. I’d never said it to anyone before, not like this. To friends and family, sure, but never to someone I was in love with. This was completely different.

Gabriel’s expression changed slowly, like it took his brain a minute to process what his ears had heard. I watched surprise and guilt and joy move across his face in flickering micro-expressions. Someone who didn’t know him wouldn’t have spotted it at all. How could I have possibly thought he was expressionless when we’d first met? He was an open book, just one written in another language.

“Marcus told me your magic is going wrong,” he said. “That it’s hurting you.”

I winced and lifted the hem of my shirt so Gabriel could see the cracks, and he sucked in a breath. “They don’t hurt most of the time,” I reassured him quickly.

“Most of the time,” he repeated pointedly.

“When it’s bad, it’s… pretty bad.”

Gabriel’s eyes turned dark with concern. He reached out to touch my chest, then hesitated. I took his wrist and moved his hand closer, pressing his cool palm against the branching cracks. He touched them gingerly, prepared to fling himself away from me if I showed even the tiniest bit of discomfort.

“It seems so unfair,” he said, barely louder than a whisper. “So much has been put on your shoulders.”

I leaned forward and rested my head against his forehead. “On both of us,” I said. “When this is over, I want to go out somewhere. A museum or something. Dinner and a movie. A normal date.”

His hand ghosted over my jaw, and he angled my head up until we were looking into each other’s eyes. The smile he gave me was so full of relief and hope, I almost couldn’t bear it. Part of me wanted to look away. Instead, I closed the distance and kissed him.

It was a sweet kiss, gentle and closed-mouthed. Like a first kiss with the combination of nerves and inevitability. It was as if we were touching for the first time. It was as if we’d been in each other’s lives for years.

Gabriel pulled me close, cradling my face in his hands like he’d die if he didn’t get to touch me. He poured everything he hadn’t said into the kiss, and I could feel the very edges of his mind brushing up against mine, a gentle murmur of I’m so sorry—I love you—I was scared, and I love you so much it scares me even more—I was hurting—I’m so glad I get to see you again—I love you, I love you, I love you…

I broke the kiss, not because I wanted to, but because Gabriel sometimes forgot humans needed to breathe when he got excited. I stayed pressed close, resting my forehead against his. The idea of moving away from him was unthinkable.

“We should talk. Like, for real talk about how this is going to work, because I really, really want this to work.”

Gabriel nodded, his head rocking against mine. His eyes were closed, his hands still cupping my face. He brushed his thumbs slowly over my cheeks. “We have been a bit distracted,” he said.

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