A dry, shuddering sob tore out of me, and I turned away from him, yanking my wrist free. I stomped through the dead leaves, digging my fingers into my hair. I had let it happen. If we had waited a few more minutes, if I’d trusted the uneasy feeling in my gut…
Then we would have wound up facing down Gabriel’s father, and shit would have gone sideways for all of us. Wouldn’t it? Or would we have been able to beat the odds and get away together?
Something in me gave out, and I began to cry again. I’d left Gabriel behind. I had just gotten him back, and now I’d failed him, left him in his awful father’s clutches. I should have done something, anything. Last time the curse had gotten hold of me, I’d been able to float. Maybe if I’d let myself go and allowed it to take over, I could’ve flown to Gabriel’s side? Or maybe I would’ve completely lost control again and made everything worse.
By then, I didn’t really have any more tears in me, so it was just wracking sobs and a shocking amount of snot. A few minutes later, I heard the crunch of Xarek’s footsteps through the leaves. He cleared his throat discreetly and dangled a white cloth in front of me.
“Thanks.” I sniffled and took the handkerchief. Once I’d dried my face and blew my nose, I felt a little more human.
“We should probably get moving. Your friends will be worried about you. Are you up for walking? Because I can carry you if you’re not.”
“I can walk,” I muttered, glaring up at him with eyes that were almost certainly red-rimmed.
“I know you can,” Xarek said. “You don’t have to. You barely weigh anything, and I like to be useful.”
“I’m not weak,” I insisted, although he hadn’t said I was.
Xarek huffed out a rueful laugh. “I know. You just seem tired. Besides, I like helping.”
I wiped my nose on the last remaining dry spot on the hanky, squinting up at him as I got to my feet. “So, what, you’d just carry me bridal style through the woods?”
“Of course not,” Xarek told me. “Piggyback.”
As much as I hated to admit it, it was a lot faster to let him do the walking. He kept up a steady, even pace with me on his back, and didn’t make conversation. I was grateful for the quiet. The healing potion Isabella had given me hours ago was starting to lose its oomph, and I was exhausted and achy. Xarek carried me through the woods to the curve of a road, where a well-maintained station wagon was parked. He knelt to let me off his back and unlocked the passenger door first, then slid into the driver’s seat, the car shifting under his weight.
The inside of the car was pristine, except for a faded princess sticker crookedly pasted to the inside of one of the back windows. He had those cup holder liners you could take out and run through the dishwasher, and an organizer strapped to the back of the passenger seat. Xarek dug around in the compartments of the organizer and handed me a travel pack of tissues, a single-serving bag of trail mix, and a plastic bottle of water.
“Shotgun gets to pick the music,” he told me.
I didn’t feel like listening to music. I didn’t want to like Xarek. In fact, I wanted to hate him. I wanted to kick and scream so hard that I found a way to turn back the clock and keep Gabriel away from his lunatic dad. I had to get him back. But… I wouldn’t get any closer to freeing Gabriel by being a dick to the people who were trying to help me. I took a deep breath. Somehow, I would get him back. I would find a way. But first, I wet a couple of the tissues with some of the water and wiped my face, which helped a little, although it left me holding a ball of crumpled, wet paper.
Xarek plucked it from my hand and dropped it into a trash bin behind the passenger seat, before starting the car and pulling out onto the road.
Annoyingly, Xarek was winning me over with his sheer competence and preparedness. I got the sense that if I had gone full temper tantrum, he would’ve just waited me out and then asked if I needed a snack. It should’ve felt patronizing, but he was so earnest about everything.
I sat in silence for a moment, scanning the interior of the car like I was on the job and looking for clues. I had a hunch, and following it seemed a hell of a lot better than letting myself think about what had happened on the rooftop.
“How many kids do you have?” I asked.
Xarek shot me a surprised glance, barely looking away from the road, and then smiled broadly. I could see a hint of dimples under the beard. “Is it that obvious?”
“The Cinderella sticker in the back kinda gave it away.”
“None of my own,” he told me. “But about a dozen nieces and nephews. I babysit a lot.”
“Tell me about them,” I prompted. I definitely didn’t want music, and I didn’t want to have to contribute to a conversation, but the idea of sitting in awkward silence while we drove back into the city made my skin prickle.
“Well, Vari—she’s my youngest sister’s eldest daughter—she’s just old enough that her wings are starting to come in, so…”
Xarek rambled happily about his small army of nieces and nephews for the entire drive back to Eldoria, which suited me just fine. By the time we pulled up to Gabriel’s manor, I felt a little less wrung out. The wards let me in, which made something odd and twisty happen in my chest. I stepped through the front door with Xarek in tow. Everyone was gathered in the front hall, and their heads snapped toward us immediately. Marcus was pacing, vape clenched in his teeth, and Lissa and Vic were tucked close together on a chaise. They had been talking quietly to each other when we came in. Isabella was sitting on the steps next to Theo, who looked reassuringly normal. Last time I’d seen Theo, they’d been dead on the ground, killed by my magic. No, killed by me. I couldn’t let myself off the hook like that.
Marcus started toward me, then caught sight of Xarek and froze. He cleared his throat, blinked rapidly a few times, and turned his attention back to me. “You got out,” he said. “We heard the alarm. We thought…”
“I thought you guys tripped the alarm,” I said with a frown. “It scared the shit out of me.”
“Wasn’t us,” Isabella said. “Although it was—” Her brow crinkled. “Where’s Gabriel? He told us he’d meet up with you on the roof.”
I swallowed hard, staring down at my shoes against the polished tile of the entryway.