Page 12 of Knockin' on Heaven’s Noir

I feel something similar with Logan. Just being next to him makes me feel whole and calm. The look in his eyes makes me feel wanted and when he touches me my whole body feels like it’s going up in flames. If we ever get into the same room alone I might spontaneously combust. I want to feel his body against mine more than anything.

“You looked upset when you came inside,” Ruby says as she joins her sister.

“I had a run-in with a woman downstairs who wasn’t very nice. Your brother put her in her place.” At least I think he did.

“Who was it?” Rosie asks at the same time Maggie says, “Do I need to kick her ass?”

The twins laugh and Rosie smacks Maggie in the arm.

“It was the new photographer. I didn’t get her name, but I guess she and Logan went to high school together. She didn’t seem thrilled that he was paying attention to me or that I asked him to come to the rehearsal with me.”

“You did what?” All four ask at the same time.

I can feel my face heat up. “I was asking him if the girls could come and he said yes.” The girls cheer. “Then I asked if he would come.”

“As my guest or yours?” Rosie asks slyly.

“Um, mine.”

Everyone starts talking at once. I hold up my hands and they all get quiet. I turn to Ruby and June.

“I asked Logan to the rehearsal and the dinner. I guess it’s a date. A weird one, but still a date. I like your brother, but I want you two to have realistic expectations of what this means. I’m leaving in two days. That means that Logan and I can become friends, but that’s it.” I hurt saying this and seeing the disappointment in their eyes.

“But, if you like each other…” June begins before Ruby cuts her off.

“Let’s go.” She pulls her sister from the room and closes the door with a bang.

I sit down on the ground. “I screwed up.” Tears are forming behind my eyes and I just want to sleep until it’s time to leave. “I should have kept my distance from all of them like I wanted to from the start.”

“Why didn’t you?” Maggie asks.

“What?” She was telling me to go for it and now she’s questioning me.

“You keep saying it wouldn’t work, but Rosie caught you making out in the hallway. You’ve spent all your extra time with the twins and you asked Logan out. Do you like torturing people?”

“Of course not.” I can’t believe Maggie’s treating me this way. I look at Rosie and she’s trying not to laugh. “Why are you laughing?”

“Because she’s messing with you. She wants you to realize that you are doing those things because Logan is your destiny, those girls are meant to be in your life. Remember how I was so sure that my life wouldn’t work with Alex’s and the two of you told me to get over myself? I hadn’t asked him what he wanted.”

“This is silly. This weekend is about you, Rosie, not me. I’ll try to apologize to the girls and I’ll explain to Logan that for their sake there can be no more kissing or anything.”

Maggie rolls her eyes. “For fuck’s sake, you are the most stubborn-headed idiot.”

“That’s your cue to leave. I need to get ready for the rehearsal and I want a few minutes to myself.”

Rosie and Maggie both stand to leave the room. They both kiss my head before leaving the room. It’s so quiet once I’m the only one left and although it’s what I wanted ten minutes ago, now I want the noise back.

I start to stand up when someone knocks. I assume it’s one of my sisters who forgot something and just yell for whoever it is to come inside.

My back is to the door as it opens, but I feel the difference in the air as he walks in and shuts the door. I hear the lock turn and then he says. “I needed to see you.”

“Logan, you can’t be in here.” I still don’t turn around.

“Look at me,” he commands.

“I can’t.” My words tremble along with the rest of my body. I want desperately to turn and run to him. I want him to hold me, kiss me, and make me forget everything.

“Yes, you can, baby.”

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