Page 77 of Return on Love

A few minutes later, I leave and call Lily from the cab to update her about the meeting.

“Wow, so you have an offer to be a VP with a confirmed partnership in our firm. And you also have an offer from this gaming company to head their investment division? You should be happy. Why do you sound so miserable?”

“I know, I know. I didn’t realize I could ever hate this problem of plenty. I just wish I had only one option. Then I’d have to take it, right? No decisions involved. Why is this so tough?”

“Okay. Who’s paying you more?”

“The gaming company, but not sure how it’ll be after the Partner clause kicks in.”

“Okay, and who would you rather work with?”

“Bernard is a great boss. Nick seems okay. A bit rushed. But okay.”

“So this point goes for staying on. Now the most important bit. The question with max weightage. Which type of work would you rather be doing?”

“Wish I could be sure. I hoped it would be something more creative. I mean, there’s a chance I could still do it at Nick’s company, like I did at MooreGames. But I can’t be certain. Nick expects mostly the investment part from me. Perhaps he’s not okay with me involving myself in the rest of the business. But with Bernard, I definitely don’t have that option.”

“Well, that’s it then. I think you already know where you should go. By the way, did you call back Gabriel?”

“No. I haven’t had time,” I lie. The truth is, I don’t want to talk to Gabriel. It brings up memories I’d rather bury.

My mind is still muddled when I reach home, so I decide to play some games. Thankfully, RamBam is online. I smile and ping him.”

“Fortnite?”

“Nah. Not in the mood for a game.”

“What happened? Trouble with your girl?”

“She doesn’t like me and doesn’t want anything to do with me. And I feel used and discarded. Like an old sock. Can we not talk about her?”

“I’m sorry, RamBam.”

“Yeah. Forget it. Forget her. Howz your douchebag? And how’s your project?”

“Project is good, though I’m thinking of changing my job. Douchebag is a douchebag still. You know what? Maybe it’s all karma. That’s why we don’t get love.”

“Bullshit. I’ve loved her for a long time. There’s no karma that justifies her behavior to me.”

“Maybe you deserve better.”

“There is no one better for me. When she smiles, she lights up my world. When she laughs, the sun seems brighter. When she’s with me, everything seems more beautiful. And when she’s not around, everything seems dull and monochromatic. I miss her.”

“Have you told her this?”

“Not in so many words.”

“Tbh, if you love her so much, fight for her instead of chatting with me and wallowing in pity. C’mon man, go get your girl. She’ll be a fool to pass up someone who loves her like you do.”

“You really think so?”

“Of course. I mean, you don’t really get people who love you like you love her. So go!”

“Thanks, Princess. I’ll cya later. All the best for your job search.”

And RamBam goes offline. I wonder if he’s going to get his girl. Chatting with him, I can see not all men are alike. RamBam seems good. I envy the woman he loves and wonder if someone will ever love me with this intensity. It sure must feel nice.

I think of Ryan, who can’t even stoop down to call mere plebeians like me. And when he messages, he’s all formal and straight lipped, as if there was nothing between us. It hurts more than it should and I just don’t want to think about it right now.

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