Page 74 of Return on Love

I shrug. Yesterday, in my heightened state, I’d told Weber I’ll quit. But today, I’m not too sure. “I don’t know. I mean. That’s the degree I have, right? What else will I do?”

“Write a book. You always wanted that. You can do freelance consulting, or even join some other firm or even a bank. With your skills and intelligence, you have a lot of options. Degree is only to give you a particular skill. It doesn’t bind you to a particular destination. You choose the path you wanna take in your life.”

I look at Lily, my eyes open wide. “Are you high? Early in the morning?”

She chuckles. “Looks like it, isn’t it? But I mean it, though this is the max wisdom I can dole out for the entire day, or maybe a week.”

I smile and dismiss it. But I can see she has a point. I have this opportunity where I can choose a different path in my life. A path that I’ll enjoy. What do I want to do? When have I felt most alive?

The image of discussions on the games at MooreGames pops up in my head. The time when I framed the storyline for the new game. I felt alive and genuinely happy doing it. I don’t think I ever felt that kind of happiness when creating financial models on Excel.

“You’ve thought of something?” Lily asks. “You have that twinkle in your eyes that I’ve missed seeing for so long.”

Before I can answer, my phone rings. It’s Bernard.

“Hey,” I say, as I swipe up on my phone. “Hope you’re feeling better now that you’re in the clear.”

“It’s rad!”

“Rad! I’ve missed your saying it. Glad to have the real you back.”

“I don’t know how, but I’m sure you have something to do with all this. I don’t need to know the details, but… thank you.”

“What! I didn’t do shit.” But my tone conveys the happiness that he knows I had his back. “Truth always comes out. Right?”

“Yeah, right! In a perfect world. But what’s this I’m hearing? That Weber offered you a VP position, and you declined?”

“News travels fast!” I’m on a back foot now. I don’t want Bernard to feel as if I’m leaving him.

“I know you’re one of the most capable people we have right now. What if I offer you a VP position now and a fast-track plan to become partner within a year and half? Would that change something for you?”

Wow! This is huge! Dad will finally be proud. No one’s made VP with an assurance of being partner, that too in such a short time, except maybe Priscilla, but she doesn’t count. My brain tells me I should say yes. It’s what I wanted, what I’d been working for. But somehow I cannot get myself to agree.

“What happened? Cat got your tongue?” Bernard asks with a chuckle. “Why don’t you think about it? Tell me by Monday. Okay?”

“Thanks, Bernard. Just the fact that you consider me capable of this means a lot to me. I’ll let you know on Monday.”

“And Eva. Don’t think you owe me or anyone else in the firm anything. This is your decision. I’d love to have you here, of course. But don’t let that be the deciding factor. I’m here because I love this work. I enjoy mentoring people like you, talking to founders of various companies, helping them grow. It’s the reason I love waking up every morning. It’s the reason I have a spring in my step when I walk up to my office. I hope you too feel the same. But if you don’t, it’s okay. Think this through deeply, carefully.”

My mind is completely occupied thinking about what I really want. I mean, partner in our firm! That’s the dream, right? But it doesn’t give me the kick I’d always dreamed it would. But when I think of MooreGames, a smile appears on my lips and a feeling of excitement in my heart. By next afternoon, I’ve decided. I discuss with Lily.

“Is it because of the man with the perfect abs and Greek god face?” she asks, wiggling her eyebrows so hard that I fear they might just fall off.

I think before answering her question. Is it? Then I shake my head. “No. I enjoy gaming and that’s what I want to do. That’s what gives me the spring in my step.”

“Really? So you’re saying Ryan is nothing to you? If that’s the case, I have a friend in Boston. Would it be okay if I introduced the two of them?”

“I don’t think Ryan is looking for relationships right now.”

“Neither is she. Just a fling, y’know.”

I know she’s probably joking, but it still stings. “Yeah, whatever.”

Lily bursts out laughing. “Dude, you need to tell him how you feel.”

“There’s nothing to feel. Nothing to tell. You know. Men! They’re all bad. And pathetic. Plus, he went behind my back and met Priscilla. Even signed that stupid agreement of hers.”

“That’s silly! He probably did it to get the virus on her system. What’s wrong with you? He’s not Bob. And he’s not your dad. You better stop thinking everyone is like them. That’s what your therapist also told you, right? You have to let the past go so you can move into your future.”

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