Page 13 of Fake Out Forever

“You never mentioned that you were loved, duchess. You’ve been cared for. You’ve been tended to. But have you been loved?”

“I… I don’t know.”

I study her face; there’s pain there. A sadness that I can relate to. “I haven’t been loved.”

“You haven’t?” She looks shocked.

“No. Both my parents were addicts. Hardcore addicts. They always chose the drugs over me and my brother.”

“I’m so sorry, Cade.”

“Me too,” I tell her truthfully. “I’m sorry for me, and I’m sorry for you, too.”

“But my parents weren’t into drugs.”

“Addiction comes in many forms.” I sigh. “Drugs, money, perfection… it’s all the same thing. When you choose any of it over your children, over your family, it’s an addiction no matter how you slice it.”

“Wow. I never thought of it that way.” She gives me a sad smile. “How are your parents today? They must be so proud of you and your career.”

“I don’t know. They went to prison sixteen years ago.” I shrug. “Along with my brother. He got sucked into their lifestyle. Lucky for me, I didn’t. Hockey has been my world.”

“Oh, Cade. I had no idea. Is that why you’ve never decorated a tree?”

“Yup. We never had a tree when we were kids, and quite honestly, I don’t remember ever celebrating holidays or birthdays. I guess I just carried the tradition on into my adulthood. What about you? You said you’ve never decorated a tree either.”

“We weren’t allowed to. The house staff did everything. Holidays were always over the top. But they weren’t for us. They were for show.”

“I see.” I bent over and pulled a Santa out of a box. “Looks like we’re changing things, aren’t we?”

“I think we are,” she said, holding up a bow. “Is this too big for the tree?”

The use of the word we has a knot forming in my chest. I look at her, startled to see the light in her eyes. She feels it, too. Maybe I should tell her that in less than a month, I will no longer be a hockey player. “I think it’s perfect.”

“Good. Our first tree is going to be beautiful.”

As soon as the words come out of her mouth, she froze. And so did I.

Our first tree…

“I mean… umm…” She stuttered.

“Duchess, I know exactly what you mean.” Holy hellfire, I want more holidays with this woman… more days… more nights… more time… and more everything.

“Would you like some eggnog?” She nervously jumps to her feet.

“As long as it's spiced.” I grin.

“Spiced it is.”

“Great. While you’re doing that, I’ll go grab some more wood for the fire.”

She heads for the kitchen, stops, and glances over her shoulder. “Cade?”

“Yeah.”

“Thank you for not judging me.”

“Right back at you, duchess.”

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