Page 60 of Excess

The problem was, I was too.

Who the fuck was I to complain about how other people treated Inika when I literally got off on degrading her? Yeah, she got off on it too, but I still felt like I was in no position to defend her honour.

Once the guys were done, I removed the protective floor covering and hoovered up every bit of dust I could reach. Undoubtedly, Graeme would be along afterwards to polish, tutting and complaining, but he didn’t have anything to complain about.

It looked fucking phenomenal in here.

The rest of the house was still boring—with the exception of Inika’s suite of private rooms—but the ceiling above this formerly abandoned staircase was a fucking masterpiece once more.

Inika appeared right as I was considering messaging her, dressed surprisingly casually in loose forest-green shorts and a matching top that hung off one shoulder. She’d pulled her hair up off her neck, though loose strands curled around her face, and I was pretty sure she didn’t have any make-up on.

It took everything in me not to snatch her up into my arms and carry her away to whatever nest she’d let me into, just to hold her.

“Blake…” Inika breathed, staring up at the ceiling. “It looks incredible. I love it.”

“I’m glad,” I grunted, forever uncomfortable with anyone complimenting my work.

She looked up at me with a beaming smile, eyes shining with happiness, and my lungs were suddenly too small to hold the air I needed.

“We have to stop doing this now,” I rasped, my throat strangely tight. “This… Us. We need to stop.”

Her expression shuttered right in front of my eyes, all of that openness melting into perfect… politeness.

I felt my heart crack in my chest.

“You’re probably right.” She exhaled like the weight of the world was on her shoulders, and all I wanted to do was take it away. “I’ve honestly been thinking the same—I’m not just saying that to assuage my ego. I’m not confident that I had the courage to make the call, and it’s… Well, it’s time.”

“What do you mean by that?” I asked, my throat dry. “What do you mean you didn’t have the courage to make the call? I never want you to feel afraid around me, Inika.”

“I’m not afraid,” she assured me with a brave smile, though her eyes were sad. “Never that. I’ve just grown more attached to you than is probably appropriate, considering the circumstances. That’s my responsibility to manage, not yours,” she added hastily when I opened my mouth. “And I’m sure it’ll pass with time as these things do. I certainly hope you’ll still feel that you can call on me as a friend and support system for Freya. I really would like to keep in touch with her.”

I nodded mutely, not trusting myself to speak. If “I’ve grown attached” had felt like a spear to the gut, it was nothing compared to “it’ll pass.”

Those two words had unravelled my entire world.

With one last sad smile, Inika backed away, her gaze lingering on my face until the last possible moment. And then she rounded the corner and she was gone, leaving me alone in the hallway.

Had she gone back to her nest? Did it still smell like me? If it did, she was probably stripping off the linens right now.

That thought had no right to hurt as much as it did.

This had always been a dangerous game. It was always going to feel like paradise at the time, and an acute kind of agony when it ended.

The ventilation system kicked into overdrive as I gathered up the last of my things, cycling fresh air through the corridor and erasing the last of my scent.

With shaking hands, I headed down through the staff entrance and out to my van, leaving my access card on the kitchen counter on my way past.

It’ll pass.

Maybe it would for Inika. She wanted love, she wanted a mate, she just hadn’t found the right one yet. When she did—and how could she not? Inika was perfect—she’d remember me as a fond blip in her memories.

I’d remember her as my one great love.

Chapter 18

INIKA

Well, getting up this morning had been a mistake.

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