Page 4 of No First Kisses

“There she is.”

In a moment of intimacy that I’m not expecting, Logan runs a finger down my cheek while he starts to move slowly.

I’m already on the very edge of the precipice, but the look in his eyes, even in the darkness that consumes us, is what drags me into the type of bliss that only Logan can give me.

“Hurry.” The words come out on a gasp.

My legs, wrapped around his waist, go stiff and lock. My hands claw at the skin on his shoulders while I let the orgasm take over. With my eyes still locked on his, I finally let go. Until I can’t keep my eyes open anymore, and I have to shut them against the onslaught of emotions that I find myself completely unable to hold back.

Don’t let him see you cry.

He rolls off me the same way he always does, and I hear him walk into my bathroom. Then the water turns on. A few seconds later, he’s back, using a warm cloth to help clean the mess we’ve made, and my heart starts to race against his careful touch. He’s never done that before. Never stopped to take care of me after we are done.

An amazing orgasm that leaves me breathless and practically begging for more is one thing. Logan is the best I’ve ever had. But in the dark, he never demands my feelings. My eyes. He never says my name the way he has this time. And when my heart finally starts to beat normally and the blood pounding in my ears subsides enough to let me hear what is happening around me, I wait for Logan’s excuses. The same ones he makes every single time we are together.

Sorry. I have to go. Stay safe.

Like a broken record, he never deviates from his script, and he never stays long enough for me to tell him that he doesn’t need to apologize. That he doesn’t owe me anything. Not after he keeps breaking my heart simply by existing.

While I wait for the excuse, for the apology that ruins all of the erotic bliss that I’m still reliving in the moment, I listen for the sound of him moving around to get dressed.

My ears are met with nothing but silence.

Finally, I open my eyes, expecting to be blinking into the darkness, but he left the bathroom light on. Logan stands there, right next to my bed, staring down at me with a dark expression on his face.

He’s also completely naked, which should take away from the intimidating effect he usually has, but it doesn’t.

“What?” I don’t mean to snap the question, but he’s unnerving. Silent and still, his head tilts at a small angle, and the look on his face… It’s enough to have me biting my lip with how nervous he makes me.

Like he’s been snapped out of a trance, Logan clears his throat and straightens up to his impressive height.

“You’re not really moving, are you?”

His question catches me off guard, and instinctively, I grab the blankets and lift them up practically to my chin.

“Y-yeah.” I stammer over the word. “That’s been my plan the last few months.”

He leans down, and I’m met with the tantalizing view of him getting dressed.

With a nod, he walks out.

And I’m left with nothing but the memory of his touch and the tears that I don’t bother trying to hold back anymore.

2

LOGAN

Pick up the fucking phone, Ian. Please.

The silent plea must have done something, because on the tenth ring, Ian answers with a growl.

“This better be fuckin’ good or I’m going to murder you.”

In the background, I hear his wife slap him.

“What, Chloe? They called the house at four in the morning. I think that deserves at least a little bit of an ass-kicking if it’s not an emergency.”

“Who would call in the middle of the night if it’s not an emergency, Ian.” Chloe’s voice snaps at him, and then I can hear her hit him with what I’m assuming is a pillow from the soft thunk.

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