Page 14 of No First Kisses

POPPY

I could have told Logan that I was coming with my family and crashing the annual Pierce camping trip, but I didn’t. Why? Because he had the audacity to walk into my dispatch office and try to tell me I can’t go on a date with someone. And yes, that was a month ago, but that doesn’t matter.

Does it matter that I don’t want to go on a date? Hell no.

But Logan doesn’t get to tell me what I can or can’t do.

So, instead of telling him that I’m coming with my parents, that Idecided at the last minute that I want to accept Lucas and Maria’s invitation for the first time since Logan and I broke up, I keep it to myself.

For the exact moment that he turns around from a conversation with one of his brothers and his mouth hangs open like he’s a fish caught on a line.

“You didn’t tell him?” my sister Evie hisses when she gets a look at Logan’s panicked expression, before he quickly smiles and slaps his brother on the shoulder.

My twin, in every sense of the word, she reads the smile on my face for what it is and starts snickering. “I don’t wanna hear it when he decides to flip out on you.”

“He won’t,” I whisper back as we start to unload.

Behind us, our parents are loudly talking to Maria and Lucas.

“I can’t believe you made it that quickly. Come on over. Andrea, Dean, you two thirsty?” Lucas and Dad slap hands together, and he offers my dad a beer. For breakfast. “We weren’t expecting to see you until after dinner sometime.”

“That’s because our children,” Mom says while tossing a glare at me and Evie, “decided that they didn’t want to sleep, and after Poppy got off shift, we had a quick bite to eat at Denny’s and headed out this way.”

“Poppy.” Logan stops directly in front of me, and all of a sudden Evie is gone like she wasn’t ever there to begin with. “Do you have a minute?”

My eyes devour him, just like they always do when he is around. From the tips of his light-brown hair to his piercing blue eyes, all the way down to the tattoo on his wrist that he got the day he turned eighteen.

“No.”

Am I running away? Totally. I have absolutely zero strength to stay away from Logan. He knows it. I know it. Hell, everyone in Birch County knows it. There isn’t a time after we started dating that people in our town haven’t said that we are adorable together. Avoiding him for the last four weeks has practically been torture.

Every single night I go to bed expecting him to break the lock on my window or to pick the deadbolt that I’ve used in a feeble attempt to keep him out. But he never does, at least not anymore. I can’t decide if that makes me happy or if it breaks the remnants of my heart even more.

Is this what he’s always felt? This push and pull of trying to find peace but none existing away from me? Because that’s what I feel like. I wanted him to leave me alone for so long. But now that he has, I just want to punch him because that’s not what I want.

Which is why I decided to go on the camping trip. Admittedly, I’m not making any sense, even to myself. But I can’t do anything about it at this point, mostly because Evie and my parents are the ones who drove up while I fell asleep in the back seat for a little while.

When a barely audible growl leaves Logan’s lips, I blink and stare at him like he’s grown a second head.

“I meant it,” I snap irately. “We don’t have anything to talk about. Just like I said before.” Yes, I’m panicking, but I don’t know what else to do at this point.

The corner of his mouth kicks up into a half smile, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. And the glimmer there, like I’m a piece of meat he wants to devour, makes my stomach clench. Instead of saying anything to me, though, he turns to our parents.

“Did you know Poppy’s planning on moving out of Birch Harbor?”

With that bomb dropped, he winks at me and walks into the woods with his sister and youngest brother trailing right behind him.

Finn, however, doesn’t move a muscle. He stands there, looking like a younger version of Logan, and crosses his arms over his chest. He’s staring at me like I did something wrong, even though I know I didn’t.

Meanwhile, I can feel the tension from both sets of parents at my back, and I know if I don’t move soon, I’ll end up on the receiving end of whatever they are working up to.

“Have you lost your ever-loving mind?” comes from Evie, who I didn’t expect to say a word. “You’re not actually moving, are you?”

I sigh, trying to avoid the judging looks in both her and Finn’s eyes, and make the mistake of turning so that our parents can see me.

Shit.

“Tell me it’s not true, Poppy.” Mom has her fingers over her mouth and tears in her eyes.

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