Page 69 of Curses & Kitsune

I park the car at the entrance to Iya Shrine. The woods around me are quiet and serene, my footsteps crunching over pebbles as I open Jinta’s door. “Come on, Sunshine.” I carefully lift him into my arms, adjusting him so his head rests on my shoulder. I kiss his cold forehead. “I’m almost there. Wait for me.”

With my mate in my arms, I set off through the woods. When I pass beneath a wooden gate, I’m heading in the right direction. As my foot touches the ground beyond the gate, a strange sensation prickles up my spine, and my stomach swoops, like I’ve missed a step on the stairs. Magic hangs like a mist in the air, invisible to the eye, but undeniable. The air grows colder, the woods darker as the tree branches obscure the sunlight.

The Iya Shrine is dedicated to the goddess Izanami, creator of the world. A woman stands before the shrine, head bowed and hands clasped. She turns toward me, face covered by a surgeon’s mask. Her hair is stained gray, her eyes lined. “Let us begin,” she says and motions toward the shrine. “Place him upon the altar.”

Right to business. Good. Heart thumping, I lower Jinta onto the altar.

“Hold his hand tightly. Do not let go, or you will be lost.”

I lace my fingers with Jinta’s and squeeze, closing my eyes tightly.

The necromancer begins to chant in low, guttural tones as the wind kicks up, growing cold. A flash of light makes me wince even through my closed eyes. A portal yawns wide beyond the altar. Mist pours from it along with a salty aroma, like we’re near the ocean. The light gets brighter, threatening to blind me.

I clutch Jinta’s hand and refuse to let go, even as the portal swallows us whole.

Chapter 25

The banquet is in full swing around me as spirits dine with Izanami herself.

A sea breeze curls into the temple, and from my seat by the window, I have views of the endless horizon and the waves as they crash against the rocky face of the cliff far below. It’s beautiful here, but the urge to weep has left a lump in my throat for hours now that comes and goes.

The goddess herself welcomed me to the land of Yomi. It had been, well, flustering. I bowed so low I hurt my back, face hot. She’d invited me to dine but warned me that once I ate in her temple, I would never be able to return to the world of the living. I would pass on to whatever realm awaits me after this one. Paradise, maybe? Or I could refuse the food and linger on as a spirit.

I don’t know what would be worse; passing on and never seeing Raiden again, or being able to see him but unable to touch him and speak with him. It tormented me to see him cry over my lifeless body; to hear him finally tell me he loves me without being able to say it back and hold him in my arms.

Lips quivering, I touch the severed thread around my finger. It’s been slowly unraveling into nothing but strings. I’m losing my connection to him by the minute. This wasn’t supposed to happen. That stupid, stupid fight should never have been our last conversation. It isn’t fair.

Alone by the window, I watch as the spirits rise from the banquet table, and the goddess leads them to a door at the end of the temple. As she slides the doors open, the twittering of birds echo from beyond, and golden rays of sun shine upon the tatami mats. The spirits are always overjoyed at whatever lies beyond the door and pass through without hesitation, some even crying out the names of what I assume are loved ones.

So, the afterlife does exist. Or at least, the Shinto interpretation of the afterlife. I wonder if different religions have something similar to Yomi. I’ve successfully unraveled one of life’s biggest questions. Too bad I’m too bitter and heartbroken to care. Maybe if Raiden and I got to grow old and gray together, I would be happier to be here.

Izanami approaches me and offers a smile. Black hair frames her round, pale face, and the hems of her white robes trail over the tatami. “Waiting for someone?” she asks.

“Yes. I don’t want to go without him.” No matter how long it takes, I’ll wait for Raiden to join me.

“Your loyalty and devotion are beautiful. You’re welcome to wait for him beyond the door, as well.”

“Will I… will I know when he’s here if I go through?” My eyes sting.

“Of course.”

At a loss, I turn away and gaze out over the ocean to hide the tears in my eyes. The ground beneath me rumbles, and the temple begins to shake. The spirits cry out in alarm, and plates of food spill onto the floor. The thread around my finger begins to levitate, pulling taut toward the front doors.

My heart soars as a familiar presence glows warm in my chest, the dormant bond bursting to life like flowers in spring. I’m on my feet, staring spellbound at the doors as the red string of fate around my finger glows.

The doors burst open, and Raiden fills the doorway. His eyes are wide and wild, chest rising and falling fast. Joy surges through me, lifting my heart and bringing tears to my eyes. He’s here. Somehow, Raiden is here, and as our eyes meet, his yuzu scent sweet in the air, I run to him.

Raiden meets me halfway, arms flying around my shoulders. He pulls me in close, wrapping me in the warmth and strength of his arms. A shudder racks his body, the salty scent of his tears stings my nose. “Jinta,” he whispers my name like a prayer again and again.

My own tears course down my face, and I throw my arms around him, clutching him to me. “I never thought I’d see you again,” I confess, finally allowing myself to admit a truth too terrible to face alone.

“I know,” he whispers, framing my face in his big hands. Tears cling to his eyelashes, and his face is wet. I’ve never seen him so vulnerable.

A sob escapes me. “You’re not a disappointment. You’re not. I don’t know why I said that. I’m so sorry.”

Raiden wipes away my tears with the gentle caress of his thumbs over my cheeks. “I was a coward, and I was being selfish. You’re right. I was acting just like my father. I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m done letting the bullshit from my past come between us. I swear to you, Jinta, I’m going to spend every day of my life being the man you deserve. I love you, my sunshine, my mate, my love.”

I can’t stop the flow of my tears. I was so afraid I’d never hear him say those words to my face… that I’d never be able to say them back. “I love you, too.”

---