Page 50 of Curses & Kitsune

The airport terminal bustles with activity. All the smells and sounds rankle my wolf. I’ll be lucky if I don’t eat some screaming kid on the plane. By the time we clear security, I’m ready to crawl out of my damn skin. I want to be home in Tokyo with my pack, wrapped in the familiar scents of my den.

“Are you hungry?” Jinta asks.

Not really, but I should probably eat something now. “Maybe.”

Jinta laughs. “How can you be maybe hungry? How about we stop in that restaurant over there? Their sushi looks good.”

Shrugging, I drag my feet over to the restaurant. We have an hour and a half before our flight, so we’ve got time to kill. Once we’re seated, we order. I swipe through my phone to occupy myself and to avoid looking at Jinta. Looking at him feels like a chisel is pounding into my chest, shattering my bones like glass.

I’m so fucking embarrassed he saw me break down like that. He shouldn’t have had to see me at my worst. He says he loves me, but how can he? It makes no sense.

My phone buzzes, disrupting my thoughts. It’s Ren. Grateful to have a distraction, I swipe. “Hey.”

“Did you find your mother?” she asks.

“Yeah.”

She huffs. “And? How’d it go?”

I shrug, then remember she can’t see. “She told us about a secret place she and my father liked to visit.”

“So you’re not coming back?” There’s a current of anxiety in her voice.

“Why, what’s wrong?”

Across the table, Jinta looks up, body stiffening.

Ren says, “I don’t know. All day today, I’ve felt like someone was following me.”

My fingers squeeze my phone. “Really?”

“Yeah.” She sighs. “I’d feel like someone was watching me, but every time I turned around, I never saw anyone. And earlier, when I came home from grocery shopping, my door was unlocked, but I swear I’d locked it!”

A low growl escapes me. “Tell me you’re not still at your apartment.”

“Duh. I’m not a dumbass, Raiden. I’m staying with my girlfriend in a whole other ward.”

“Huh? You have a girlfriend?”

She groans. “Yes! If you’d listen when I talked to you, you’d know that.”

That’s good she’s safe, or she should be, but my blood pressure has gone way up. Frustration tightens my jaw. Fuck. I should be there. “Sorry.” Guilt makes me hang my head.

“No, don’ be!” She laughs. “It sounds like you’re close to finding your father. Stay on his trail, and let me know what happens!” A distant voice says something, I’m guessing her girlfriend. “Coming!” Ren calls. “We’re having dinner now.”

“So are we.”

I can hear the fondness in her voice when she says, “Enjoy and don’t worry, boss man. Say hi to Jinta for me.”

Our sushi arrives just as I hang up. Jinta and I dig in, and I try to keep my mind off Ren and the pack.

During the flight to Osaka, Jinta fell asleep beside me, hair tousled, cheek smooshed against my shoulder.

Disgust claws at me. I want to push him away and run before I detonate in his face and ruin everything. I’m such a selfish bastard. Meeting me is the worst thing that could have happened to him, but he’ll never leave me. Jinta will follow me into hell and back, and I would let him.

I’ve got to end this. Us. My eyes sting, and an ache rises in my throat. It has to happen. Before he realizes he’s better off without me and leaves anyway. Like my parents. It will be easier if I leave first. At least that much is in my control.

A little voice whispers, what’s happening to me? Jinta loves me. He’d never leave me. Why am I thinking this? But I ignore it, close my eyes, and try not to break down in the middle of a packed airplane.

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