Page 81 of Secrets & Sake

Once I’m outside, I suck in a breath and try to calm my throbbing heart. As I walk, my mind races and bogs down my steps. My rage at my family still has such a grip on me. What am I doing this investigation for? Is it for me? Even if I complete my investigation, I can’t imagine it will make a difference. My family will never be proud of me. I’ll never be good enough.

“You okay?” Raiden asks once we reach the car.

I don’t know how to answer. I’m pretty sure I just ruined any second chance with my family. But does that really matter? I have Raiden. Someone who supports me and sees the best in me. What do I need them for?

Sudden emotions squeeze my heart. I’m so grateful for him. Framing his face in my hands, I tug him down into a kiss, not caring who turns up their noses at our public display of intimacy. “Thank you,” I whisper against his lips.

A content hum escapes him as he nuzzles his forehead to mine. “Told you I’d always take care of you, didn’t I? Now, how about I grab us some food from that convenience store over there? We can eat at home.”

That sounds amazing. I return to the car while Raiden heads into the store across the street. My neck prickles. Someone is watching me. I look back toward the izakaya and scowl when I notice Katsuki in the doorway, watching me through the car window. When he approaches the vehicle, I feign sudden interest in my phone. He raps loudly on the glass, making me grimace.

I roll down the window. “What?” I ask, voice ice-cold.

Katsuki drags on a cigarette. “Nice car. Your rich thug of a boyfriend buy it for you?”

My fingers curl. “No, actually. But I bet Dina makes you buy all sorts of things for her. You know she only said yes to that big diamond ring, right?”

A muscle tics in Katsuki’s jaw. “Fuck you.”

“I’m sorry if you’re jealous, Katsuki. Really. It must suck being engaged to someone who only looks at you and sees a big money sign.”

Katsuki leans into the open window and blows smoke in. Jaw tight, I stare him down, fury heating my blood. “Enjoy him until he realizes what a disappointment you really are.”

My fingers curl. “He won’t—”

Katsuki snorts, a smirk tugging at his mouth. “You don’t deserve a guy like that. He’s hot. Rich. Way more interesting than you.” Dragging on his smoke, he walks backward away from the vehicle, then crosses the street and goes into the convenience store.

My knuckles are white from how hard I’ve balled up my fists. The breath saws in and out in fast huffs from my nose. Katsuki is wrong. Raiden cares about me. He said so himself.

But so did Takahiro.

No. Don’t do this.

Despair claws at me as I struggle to hold on to my confidence. My family threw me aside. The man I thought I’d loved cheated on me to be with my brother, the man who’d always dwarfed me in his shadow.

Love is conditional. That’s what I’ve been taught. Love lasts until it doesn’t, and you’re left with a hole in your heart that never heals.

If I can’t trust Raiden’s feelings, then how can what we have ever hope to last?

Chapter 22

Ihaven’t realized I’ve been staring at a carton of instant ramen for a minute until an old lady next to me says, “Excuse me.”

I shuffle out of her way and give my head a shake, but I can’t seem to clear it. Namikawa has been controlling me. Making me abduct people. Why? For what purpose? I wonder if the people I abducted were folks who couldn’t pay their fees on time.

The son of a bitch could get me in major trouble if I’d been caught. It’s bad enough Takada’s pissed at me, pissed enough to threaten the pack with war. But what if I’d been arrested? Guess Namikawa wouldn’t have cared if I’d spent life behind bars so long as I did what he wanted. Bastard.

Fury makes me gnash my teeth. I grab a pork cutlet bowl for Hiro and some sesame noodles for myself. Chucking both items in the basket with a low growl, I stomp over to the register and wait in line. The automatic doors whoosh open.

“Hey,” someone says to me.

The sight of Katsuki makes me scowl though I’ll be honest, guys like Katsuki are usually my go-to for a quick, meaningless fuck. When I look at him, though, it just does nothing for me.

How could I want anyone else when I have my sweet Hiro?

Guess my days as Tokyo’s most ineligible bachelor are over.

I hand the cashier some bills. “What do you want?” I ask Katsuki, not even looking at him as I accept my change.

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