Page 46 of Truck Off

“Did you take your morning meds?” I ask even though I know he did. I already see his pills are gone. It’s more a way of changing the subject.

“Yeah,” he mumbles as he heads to his recliner.

“Do you want more coffee?” I ask before I rinse out the carafe to make a fresh pot.

He picks up his mug from the end table and looks inside it before he answers me. “Another cup would be nice, doll. Thank you.”

I smile at his softer tone. This is how it always goes. He gets frustrated with himself when he can’t do something on his own, lashes out about how I shouldn’t have to care for him, and then settles down once I do just that.

There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for my dad. His MC lifestyle may be responsible for our current situation and a lot of my past pain, but he protected me when no one else would. He stood up to Smoke and refused to let that man anywhere near me. A lesser man would have given Smoke what he wanted to save his own skin.

Life was hell for dad after that, but he never wavered in my protection. He committed the ultimate sin against the MC. He put his daughter first.

The tea kettle whistles, so I finish up Dad’s breakfast. Or maybe it’s lunch. It’s almost eleven now. I really did sleep late.

Once Dad is settled with his food and more coffee, I search for something to feed myself. We don’t have much. I need to go shopping again.

I finally decide on a packet of beef flavored ramen noodles. The sodium content isn’t going to do me any favors, but it’s cheap and fast. It will also hold me over for a few hours. I still have some beef jerky left that I’ll eat for dinner, along with an apple.

As I eat my noodles, I flip through the stack of bills on the counter. It just keeps growing and growing. The cable bill is paid, so that’s one less thing I have to worry about. I’d let it go if it weren’t for Dad. He’s stuck here all day, every day, and needs some form of entertainment besides books.

The medical bills taunt me. With Dad’s health, they’re never ending. Aside from his medication and primary care physician, I can push most of those aside for now. It’s the electric bill that has me worried.

I made a payment, but it wasn’t enough. If I don’t make a hefty payment by next Friday, they’re going to shut it off. Whatever savings I have is going to have to go to it.

Which means no hot water for a few more weeks. I also have to push off work on my car a little longer.

And then there’s the matter of paying Chase back for the supplies. There’s no way I can accept the ink and cabinet as a gift now that I know the truth.

I can easily figure out the cost of the ink since that’s something I buy all the time, but I’ve no clue how much the cabinet cost. He won’t tell me either.

Maybe Rob can figure it out since he’s considering upgrading all the other cabinets now to match.

I let out a low puff of air. How is this my life?

Despite how bad things are here at home, for a moment, I was happy. I had such a great time on my date with Chri—no, Chase. Chase Mutter. I can’t believe he tricked me like that. It makes no sense.

His words from our confrontation echo through my mind.

When I asked you out, I thought you knew it was me. I was on top of the world with that answer.

I’ve wanted to ask you out for so long and for the first time since I’ve known you, you showed a fucking interest.

And then you called me Christian. Talk about a slap in the face.

He couldn’t possibly mean any of that. He made it sound like he’s wanted to go out with me for a long time—pining after me. That can’t be true. He’s never once given me any indication that he even noticed me, let alone liked me.

I’ve asked myself more times than I can count what I would’ve said if he corrected me at the time of the mistake. If I’m honest with myself, I would have canceled. I’ve had my sights on Christian for so long, I know I would’ve been overcome with disappointment and bolted.

Because that’s what I do when things get tough and awkward. I bolt.

Maybe it was an honest mistake on his part, and maybe it wasn’t. I guess I’ll never really know.

A lie is a lie. I’ve been betrayed too many times in my life to let this one slide. I was willing to forgive him for overstepping with the supplies he gifted me, but this is too big. How could I?

How could I not?

His other words ring through my ears. Those were some of the first words he spoke when I asked him why he did it.