Page 23 of Vale of Dreams

I nod. “They’ll know who the assets are, so I can find you?”

“Yes. And once I get back, I’ll only do what Avalon Tower needs. Not what I decide on my own, because…” His voice breaks. “It’s not how it’s supposed to work. You are the Lady of the Lake. You have to be focused. The world needs you. We need you. But we need you focused on Avalon Tower, not on me.”

I blink the tears from my eyes. “You really think you know what’s best for me?”

Raphael brushes a tear from my cheek. “I think your mission here was nearly suicidal, and it’s my fault.”

“Well, Raphael, I always knew you would break my heart. It’s not the first time.”

He touches my arm, his eyes burning brighter. “Nia, I just want you to be safe. Because if you end up in that dungeon, I will lose my fucking mind.” An agonized edge laces his voice. “I want you to get out of here as quickly as possible. Right now. Where’s the portal you came through?”

“It’s in the fortress courtyard, near the weeping willow.”

“Then go back through the portal. Don’t return unless Viviane orders you. I’ll be here.”

My chest aches. “Fine.”

He grabs both my hands in his. “I think I will always love you. But this is the way it has to be.”

Another tear runs down my face, and I can hardly speak. “Please look out for the King’s Watch,” I manage, my throat tight. “I don’t want to have to rescue you again.”

He turns from me, a pained expression in his eyes as he stares at the fire. “As long as I’m not dragged here in chains, I can look after myself. I can manage. I promise. I’ll find a way to make contact if I can.”

I feel my chest hollowing out. “That’s it, then?”

Cadoc opens the door. “It’s safe. Come on out.”

Raphael stands and walks from the room without another glance. I let out a shuddering breath, feeling as if my heart has been shredded.

We cross into a kitchen. It’s dark and empty, just like I feel. Cadoc unlatches a door at the back.

“This stairwell goes all the way down,” he says. “The kitchen staff use it. If there are guards at the bottom of the stairs, they won’t be paying attention to anyone leaving. As long as you move quickly, you should be fine. But you should go separately. Yes?”

Raphael nods and looks at me. He reaches for me, then lets his hand drop, giving me a cursory nod instead. “Thank you, Nia. This is goodbye for now.”

The finality of those words is a door slamming in my face.

I can’t say anything. I feel as if my voice has been robbed from me.

He turns away and steps out of the door.

This was always how it was going to end with Raphael, wasn’t it? With heartbreak. I knew that from the start.

CHAPTER 9

Right now, my magic is erratic, and Raphael would tell me not to use it. But if he can take care of himself, then I can make my own decisions.

I need to make sure he reports none of this.

I turn to Cadoc and pour myself into his mind. I find his recent memories from the moment I showed up. I picture a white snowstorm, and I unleash it on these memories, burying them, making them disappear. Cadoc’s legs buckle under the onslaught, but I keep going until nothing of the past hour remains in his mind. Even if questioned by the King’s Watch, he won’t be able to explain how the prisoner escaped. I doubt he’ll be able to recall the prisoner at all.

Follow me, I command.

I lead him back the way we came, through the corridors and back to a wider hall. I plan to send him to the guards’ quarters, then leave through the kitchen and make my way to the portal, but I don’t want to risk letting Cadoc out of my sight too close to the kitchen. I’m about to erase his most recent memories when the sound of footsteps interrupts my thoughts.

I turn, and my heart skips a beat.

From one of the arches, the silhouette of a tall, broad man crosses into the shadowy hallway, towering over us. When he takes a step forward, a shaft of moonlight illuminates his face.

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